


Seeing Clearly

by westflash



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Cheesy, Emotions, F/M, Fate & Destiny, Feelings, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen, Invisibility, Slow Burn, au with some familiar elements, based on a book, i just have a lot of feelings about this mediocre book and i had to do something with them okay, linda doesn't appear till chapter 9 but i plan to incorporate her into the rest of this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:19:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 39,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8337907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westflash/pseuds/westflash
Summary: Barry's lived his whole life invisible, unable to be seen by anybody. One unassuming day he collides into Iris West, who can miraculously see him. He doesn't know what to believe at first, and neither does she. They know there's something special about their meeting, but they don't know what that is quite yet. Loosely based off of "Invisibility" by Andrea Cremer and David Levithan (a book which has no fics, to my great dismay.)





	1. First Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted a fic based off of this book but there was none to be found, so I decided to write my own and adapt it to a fandom that actually exists. My goal is to start off with cute fluff and eventually move into deeper plot. I hope to update frequently, especially because I'm personally invested in this story. 
> 
> Enjoy ^_^

Barry slowly opened his front door. He gave a quick look up and down the hallway, and saw no one on his floor. Sighing in relief, he took a step into the hallway and locked the door. He walked down the ancient hallway and pressed the ‘down’ button on the elevator. The elevator slowly made its loud, creaky journey up to the fourth floor and when it opened, Barry stepped in and pressed the button for the ground floor. He leaned against the side of the elevator and folded his arms together in his usual way. Looking down at them he saw nothing, but he knew he’s there. Just like he knew the sun rises in the morning, just like he knew water makes things wet, he’s there. 

He banged his head against the wall as the elevator slid to a stop on the third floor. Frail old Miss Adler from 3B shuffled in and was about to press the ground floor button when she realized it was already lit. She chuckled and readjusted her cane as she moved to hold onto the side rail. In the process, she smacked Barry right in the left arm but somehow didn’t notice his quiet yelp of pain. He rubbed the spot gingerly and stared at her in silence, bitter, in. Barry wished he could say getting injured unknowingly by other residents was a one-time occurrence, but it happened more than he’d like to admit. 

Finally, the door opened and let them out into the lobby. Barry slid out of the elevator stealthily, and he was almost at the door when he looked back to see the old woman still making her way out of the elevator. He smiled to himself and before he could turn his head around, he collided into someone. His involuntary response was to apologize, but he has been well trained his entire life. Barry knows he can’t talk to anyone, ever, and he knows it. 

The girl he bumped into, though, laughed and looked at him straight in the eye as she said, “I’m sorry, I guess I wasn’t looking where I was going.” 

Barry was stunned. He was so stunned, in fact, that the girl was already in the elevator when he turned around to see her politely wave through the closing doors. He meekly raised his hand, though the door was long closed by the time he did. His jaw dropped open, and his hands found his way to his head as they usually do when he’s nervous. Barry decided to attribute the fact that he was suddenly imagining impossible scenarios to a sudden bout of lightheadedness, so he shook it off and waited for Miss Adler to open the front door so he could sneak through it behind her. 

One of Barry’s favorite things to do is to walk around the city in the late morning and pretend like he’s a normal person on his way to college classes, work, and meetings with loved ones. He sighed and strutted along, not caring if he bumped into people. After all, everyone is always in a hurry and never notices the invisible being in their midst. 

He walked through the tall gates outside of Grand Park and sat down on a rusty bench underneath a tunnel of bright green trees. He situated his fists on his chin and studied the people walking along. An old man seemed to dance along the sidewalk, throwing bread crumbs to eager, hungry pigeons. A college-aged woman jogged along and paused close by Barry to send a quick text before continuing her run. Though it was nearly summertime, Barry spotted a man sporting a buzzcut and a navy-blue parka with fur along the hood. The man spoke angrily into a phone as he stomped down the sidewalk, but Barry couldn’t make out quite what he was saying. 

A middle-aged woman made her way towards Barry’s bench, pushing a stroller. She moved to sit down on the bench and Barry took that as a cue make his way home for lunch. 

Barry decided to take the long route home today. On the way, he thought about the girl he imagined in the lobby. She had had long, slightly curled dark hair that bounced along with her laugh. The bright-colored dress she had been wearing complimented her short, hourglass figure so magnificently that just thinking about her in it made Barry feel weak. Her full, dark pink lips were the perfect complement to her bronze complexion. In that one moment, that one glance, her warm, powerful eyes the color of earth seemed to understand everything about Barry. Barry couldn’t exactly place this feeling, but he knew it was something special. 

Unfortunately, Barry was so distracted from thinking about this girl that before he knew it, he was in the middle of a crosswalk while the light was still green. Thankfully, no cars were an immediate threat. Barry shook his head at his carelessness and ran to the other side of the street, sighing heavily as a city bus zoomed right by him. 

He shuffled his way back to his apartment building, thinking about the girl. Why did he have to imagine her? Why couldn’t he hold her, and tell her how she made him feel in that single, short-lived moment? He looked down at the ground and very frustrated, he kicked a rock into a lamppost which resounded in a deep clang. Thinking these thoughts were useless, he knew, but he couldn’t help but think about the normal, perfectly imperfect life he could never have. 

Finally, he got back to his apartment building and opened the door, realizing too late that there was someone in the lobby who looked up when the door opened. It was the girl from earlier, picking up her mail. It was then that Barry started to think that maybe she was real, but he imagined that she saw and spoke to him. He stood by the elevator, waiting for her to either leave or press the button to go up. 

“Are you going up anytime soon, or are you gonna keep staring at me?” The girl said as she tore through a manila envelope excitedly. 

Barry looked all around, but they were the only two in the room. He looked back at her, his cheeks slightly burning. The girl glanced up and noticed him gaping around like a lost chicken. 

“Yes, you. The only pale lanky dude in this room who’s donning faded dad jeans and a prison-esque t-shirt.” 

Barry suddenly remembered slipping on his favorite blue-striped t-shirt on today and all the blood seemed to rush from his face. 

The girl rolled her eyes and stormed over. “You know, if you’re not going up, you could at least stop staring at me.”  
Barry didn’t know what to do at this point. He thought it couldn’t hurt to say something. He stammered out, “I’m…sorry.” 

The girl pursed her lips together. She slid her mail into one hand and clicked the button Barry’d been waiting to press. “So, where do you live?” 

He didn’t know exactly how to respond. No one even knew he lived here, and he certainly had never seen her around before this morning. He pointed up and smiled sheepishly. 

She nodded, also unsure of what to say next. She ended up saying nothing and neither did he as they waited for the elevator. It finally arrived, and Barry let her go in first. She pressed the button for the fourth floor and stood against one side of the elevator wall. Barry stood against the opposite, simultaneously worried and gleeful that they lived on the same floor. 

Somehow he managed to get out the words, “Are you new here?” 

Her eyes lit up, grateful that the awkward silence had suddenly dissipated. “Yeah, actually. I just moved here today from the suburbs with my dad and brother. Now that I’m enrolled at Central City University, we thought it would be easier on all of us if we were closer to my school and dad’s work at the police station.” 

Barry acknowledged this with a curt nod, admittedly a bit jealous. She had two things that Barry had always craved – a chance to go to college, and a family. 

Before he could open his mouth, she spoke again. “Do you live with your parents? Are you also a student? You look the age, at least.”

He shook his head sadly. 

She stared at him, as if she were trying to see inside his soul. Barry had never been looked at like this, ever, and he found it a bit uncomfortable. Thankfully, the elevator crashed to a stop and let them out at the ever-familiar fourth floor. Barry let the girl out first before he followed along.

When they got out, they stared at each other, both unsure of what to do next. Would it be rude to part ways here, or should one of them invite the other into their apartment? 

A few moments of these silent contemplations went by before the girl took a step forward and stuck out her hand confidently. “I just realized I never introduced myself. I’m Iris West.” 

Barry stared at her hand. He hadn’t held another human being’s hand since as long as he could remember, and he wasn’t sure how to go about it. Before he could meet her hand in the middle, she took it back, coughing to cover up the awkwardness. She quietly mumbled, “All right, then”, and turned around to walk to her apartment. 

Barry stood there with his hands on his head, freaked out. He had to make this right, even though he definitely didn’t understand what was going on. Iris deserved better, which he could gather from those brief minutes of being in her company. He ran to catch up with her and when they met again at her apartment door, he stuck his own hand out. “Hi there. I’m Allen. I mean…Harry. Barry! Barry, I mean. Bartholomew, if you want. I prefer Barry.” 

Iris stared at him and giggled. She brushed a piece of silky hair out of her face and grabbed his hand. “Hi, Barry. Nice to meet you.” 

There was no feeling like this brief handshake. Barry felt as if a bolt of lightning had come down and struck him. Connecting with someone else felt electric, somehow. It was indescribable, really. Her hand was smooth and her grip was strong. Barry knew that if he didn’t concentrate, she would squeeze right through his hand. 

The door in front of them suddenly opened, and a tall, thin boy who looked sort of like Iris appeared within it. He announced, “Iris, dinner’s ready. Dad made the noodles.” 

Iris let go of Barry’s hand and passed the boy the mail. She clapped her hands together, bouncing in place. “My favorite!” She looked over at Barry. “Barry, this is my brother.” Looking back over at her brother, she asked, “Wally, have you met Barry yet? He lives down the hall, at least I think.” 

Folding his arms across one his chest, Wally asked, “Who?”

Barry’s face started to burn again. He felt rooted to the spot, though all he wanted to do was bolt down the hallway and never come back. 

Iris was confused. She pointed at Barry with her thumb and said, “He’s standing right here. Barry?” 

Barry shook his head and looked down at the floor. He didn’t see where Wally’s eyesight led him, but he did hear him Wally say to his sister, “I don’t understand what you’re getting at, but we’ll be eating dinner in a few minutes.” Wally shrunk back inside the apartment and closed the door behind him. 

Iris, clearly very stunned, looked back at Barry, who was still looking at the ground. 

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” She prodded, her voice shaking. 

For what seemed like the eightieth time, Barry shook his head. “I have to go.” 

He turned around and walked back down the hallway, shoving his hands in his jean pockets. After what felt like centuries, Barry reached his door. He unlocked it and shoved it open. Before he entered his apartment, though, he looked back at Iris. She was staring at him, tears brimming in her milky brown eyes. It took all the strength he had to ignore her clearly distraught stare and throw himself inside his apartment. He threw the key across the entryway and slid down the back of the door, hyperventilating. Through the door and his heavy breaths, he could hear her open and close her creaky door a few moments later. 

Barry had no idea what to think.


	2. New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst and fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added a line from "Flashpoint", so keep a look out for that.

For the next four days Barry avoided leaving his apartment. After all, there was no need for him to. All his groceries were delivered right to him, and he could get all the fresh air he needed from stepping out onto his petite balcony. Isolating himself in this way gave him time to think and ask unanswerable questions – why could Iris, of all people, see him? What did this mean? Did it even mean anything? The only possible conclusion he came up with was that she too was affected by the particle accelerator explosion eighteen years ago. This discovery did nothing to mellow his confusion. When he got to these standstills, he tended to retreat to the Internet, but he often found he was too frazzled to focus on pressing the letters on the keyboard. 

Finally, after these four days of stirring, Barry took the chance of leaving his apartment to pick up the mail. He opened the door just a little bit, and noticed that once again, no one was in the hallway. He slid into the hallway and was about to click the down button for the elevator when it promptly opened. 

Barry was about to get in when he saw Iris’s brother and an older man, whom Barry assumed was their father, get out of the elevator. Rather than getting in, Barry followed them to their front door when he heard Wally mention his name.

“…she’s been nonstop talking about this Barry guy. I gotta admit, I’m starting to doubt that he exists. No one around the building seems to know who he is.” 

Their father laughed nonchalantly. “Well, I’d like to think he exists. It would be nice if she’s already made a friend, I know it was hard for her to move away from home.” 

“I mean, if you can call him a friend. They only met twice.” 

Their father shrugged as he opened the door to their apartment. 

In his distracted state, Barry forgot to bolt before they opened the door. as it opened, Iris looked up from a small table and caught his eye. Immediately Barry realized he had done something wrong, and traced his steps back swiftly to his place. He thought that he could hear Iris say, “So I’m assuming you guys have finally met Barry?” 

Barry couldn’t hear their response as he fumbled with his key and the doorknob. Iris herself exited their apartment and watched him struggle. With a devilish smile, she called out, “My dad and Wally don’t seem to have met you, but you were standing right behind them. What’s that about?” 

He didn’t answer, but instead shook the doorknob rather desperately. He was finding it difficult, especially in this stressful scenario, to focus on making his hand just solid enough to twist the doorknob. 

Iris cocked her head as she continued to watch the battle down the hallway. “Need any help there?” she asked in a snarky tone. 

Something about this comment gave Barry the ability to solidify his hand. He turned the key and gave a distraught Iris an apologetic glance before disappearing inside his safe place. 

He immediately retreated to the far corner of his apartment’s main room, shrinking down in between his mother’s maroon sofa and the crème-colored wall. He hugged his knees to his chest, tucking his head deep enough that he could still see the door but still feel contracted and safe. 

Not very much time went by before he heard from the other side of the door, “Barry, it’s me.” There was nothing Barry wanted to do more than fling open the door, bring Iris into his apartment and tell her everything all about his life, his secrets unbeknownst to all but one other person. He didn’t want to get her any more involved than she already was. He simply said nothing, staring at the door from his metaphysical cage he had manifested for himself. 

A few moments later, a feeble, helpless knock sounded at the door. Barry unfolded himself, slightly intrigued. He heard a distant thud accompanied by, “Look, I’ll leave you alone if that’s what you want. You don’t need to tell me what’s going on. You just seem like you need a friend, that’s all.”

Barry stood up and took enough hesitant steps forward to eventually reach the entryway, by which time he looked through the peephole and noticed Iris had walked away. 

He kicked himself. He’d never had a friend before, and he was screwing it all up by avoiding the one person who could ever see him. He decided that it didn’t matter how she could see her, just the fact she could. 

Deciding to forgo any doubts, Barry took a calming breath before opening up the door and huffing, “Sorry that I’ve been rude,” At the sound of his voice, Iris turned around. Barry’s nerve spiked as she stared him down. “I’m just not used to…to talking to people. I really wa…want to be your friend, I…I…do.” 

In response, Iris ran up to him and gave him a powerful hug. Barry could almost feel himself fading, but with pure strength of will he managed to stay whole. Iris patted him on the back before letting him go. She took a few steps back and reassured him with a comforting smile. 

Barry felt himself smile and was about to say goodbye when Iris spoke up. “If you trust me enough, feel free to come by around noon tomorrow. I may need some help unpacking a box or two.” Barry must’ve looked uneasy to Iris, because she immediately followed up with, “Dad’s gonna be at work and Wally’s got his summer job orientation all day tomorrow. Neither one of them should be coming home, I believe.” 

Barry looked down and smiled again, this time visibly sheepish. He could feel his cheeks burning in their usual way, especially when Iris said, “Barry Allen, you’re very cute, you know that?” 

He looked up for a second, and when he saw the way she was looking at him he looked back down at the floor. “Yeah…”

“See you later, alright?” 

In a robotic way, Barry repeated what he had last said. “Yeah…” When he looked up the edge of Iris’s dress was passing through her front door. Barry stood there for quite a while, unable to process what had happened in the past few minutes. It wasn’t long before frenzied Dr. Ellis from 4C came rushing down the hallway in pursuit of the elevator. Unfortunately during this rush, he didn’t notice when his briefcase went wild and smacked Barry right in the stomach, who proceeded to fall forward, wheezing. 

\----------------------------

The next day, Barry woke up at precisely 11:00 a.m. He stumbled into the bathroom and looked into the mirror. Only the towel rack with its usual ratted gray towels reflected within it. Barry was used to this, but that didn’t mean it still didn’t make him uneasy. 

He brushed his teeth, slightly disturbed as usual by the floating toothbrush. He got dressed, trying hard not to focus too much on the way his clothes disappeared the moment they made it onto his body. He casually brushed his hair to the side, knowing it probably looked messy but also was completely helpless to fix it. He poured himself a bowl of cereal, and as he ate, he thought about the implications of pursuing a friendship with Iris in his condition. He could never meet her family. If he never told her about his invisibility, he’d be a liar. If he told her, she might never want to see him again. 

There were so many more doubts and questions building up in his mind by the second, but his stream of thoughts was interrupted by a hurried knock at the door. His eyes glanced over to the clock above the table. Barry stood up quickly, almost knocking over the table as he did so. It was 12:14 p.m., and lost in his thoughts, Barry had forgotten about visiting Iris. 

He quietly stepped over to the door and looked through the peephole. Iris was standing in front of his door, barefoot and wearing gray leggings accompanied by an oversized black t-shirt. Her hands sat on her hips, and her fingers tapped impatiently against them. Barry exhaled and unlocked the door. 

“Good morning. Thought you would keep me waiting?” 

Barry coughed nervously before he said, “It’s only 15 minutes past twel…” 

Iris grabbed his arm and yanked him out of his apartment. “I need your help.” 

He tried to pull his arm free, to no avail. “Just let me lock the door first.” 

Iris let him go and stood there tapping her foot. A pang of worry swum over Barry as he remembered his internal deliberation of the past several hours. He shook it off and locked his door, barely able to get the key out of the knob before Iris took hold of his arm again and dragged him down the hallway. 

When they got there, Iris opened their unlocked door and held it open for Barry. He walked through backwards and asked, “Didn’t you say no one was home?” 

“No one is, don’t worry.” Barry could feel the look of panic dissolve from his face. “I forgot my key, that's all. Oh, don’t give me that look.” 

“So why do you want me here, again?” 

Iris put down the bottle of water she’d been drinking. She mumbled, “Well don’t be too excited, then.” 

Barry scoffed. “I mean, what do you need my help on?” 

“I told you yesterday. Unpacking these boxes.” She held out her arm, gesturing to the main room as she lifted the water to her mouth again. 

“All of them?!” 

She put the bottle back down and replied, “I won’t subject you to that kind of torture. Just a few today.” 

Barry nodded and made his way over to the middle of the wall of boxes. “Where do you want to start?” he said as he surveyed the mess. 

From across the room, Iris pointed to a stack of boxes to the right of Barry. “Pick one from over there. I’ll be back in a few.” She disappeared into one of their apartment’s many rooms and closed the door behind her. 

Barry picked the smallest box, which rested on top of all the others. He was very careful to focus on picking it up and putting it on the floor without letting it fall through his hands. He sat cross-legged on the floor in front of it, and found a various selection of picture frames. In one of those frames was a photograph of what he presumed to be from Iris’s senior pictures. She laid vertically against a massive tree trunk, one arm grabbing the elbow of the other. She wore a short blue dress, and her wavy hair rested perfectly upon her shoulders to meet the very top of the dress. She looked right at the camera, her piercing eyes stealing the soul of anyone who looked at the photograph. Barry hadn’t realized how long he’d been staring at the photograph until he heard a door open. The picture frame fell through his fingers and clattered against the carpet, but as she was fixing her hair into a sloppy bun, she didn’t see it fall. 

When she reached the wall of boxes, she looked down and saw the picture frame on the floor. “Oh good, you started with the easiest thing. Just hand me the frames and I’ll set them out.” 

Barry picked up the frame very carefully with both hands and handed it to her as if it were a precious gemstone. She took it from him, silently noting his cautiousness and finding great amusement with it. Barry could tell, because the sides of her mouth curled up as she walked across the room to place the frame beside a lamp on a mahogany side table. She crossed the room again to take another frame and as she did so, she asked Barry, “So you never told me about your family. Where do they live?” 

He pulled another frame out of the box, this one a candid photo of her and her dad. “My mom was killed the night of the accelerator explosion. You know the one?” 

“Of course. I’m sorry to hear that, Barry.” She took the frame from Barry and gave the photograph a sad smile before putting it on the windowsill. 

Barry pulled his knees into his chest. “It’s okay.” 

“And your dad?” Iris got down on the floor and sat across from Barry. 

Barry looked down at his shoes. “I’d rather not talk about him, if that’s alright.” 

“That’s fine.” 

A few moments of uncomfortable silence passed as Iris ruffled through the box of frames. She was about to say something when the front door opened and in entered Wally. She turned around and in those few seconds she wasn’t looking, Barry immediately stood up and bolted in the direction of the door. All the blood seemed to rush from his head; he felt like he’d been dropped in a vat of ice. 

As he tossed his keys on the counter, Wally teased, “Finally getting a head start on unpacking?” 

Iris said, “Yeah, actually. Barry here was actually helping…” At that moment, Iris had turned back to Barry’s spot to see him gone. When she stood up he was by the door, holding it open by a sliver. He was in the hallway, mouthing “sorry” before he shut the door. Making his way across the hallway back to his room, he hated himself. Though he couldn’t do anything about his shitty situation, he hated himself. He unlocked his door and retreated once more inside. This time, Iris didn’t come knocking.


	3. Learning a Thing or Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iris decides to research the mysterious and rather confusing guy from down the hallway before a meeting with a college advisor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to give Iris a storyline outside of WA, and I also kinda love looking at college courses/scheduling. 
> 
> Fair warning - I'm not well-versed in writing newspaper articles, especially for a fictional universe, or in legal processes/police doings (despite watching my fair share of television shows), so try to keep an open mind while reading this chapter.
> 
> Sorry for taking awhile to update - school has been really rough lately, giving me no time to write. I probably won't be able to post another chapter for at least another week or two at the most. 
> 
> enjoy x_x

The door closed suddenly, frightening Wally who had been taking ingredients out of the refrigerator to make a sandwich. He dropped the loaf of bread on the ground. As he bent to pick it up, he wondered aloud, “Huh, that door took a long time to close…” 

Iris put down the picture frame she’d been fidgeting with. She stood up in her spot and marched over to Wally. “It closed because Barry closed it. You’re telling me you didn’t see him walk across the room and leave the apartment?” 

Wally opened up the bag of bread and replied, “No, but I haven’t eaten anything since this morning, so my debilitating hunger probably had something to do with it.” 

Iris placed her hands on the counter and looked down at the slowly growing sandwich monster on the plate in front of her. “No, I don’t think that has anything to do with it. There’s something about Barry…I don’t know what it is…but-”

“Yeah, something.” Wally said distractedly. He was carefully laying various vegetables, meats, and condiments on his sandwich as if it were an art form. “You know, I’d like to meet this guy that you won’t shut up about.” 

“I bet you would.” Iris eyed him as he placed the final piece of bread on a sandwich which already had two pieces. 

Wally picked up the sandwich and looked upon it with dreamy eyes. Before he took a giant bite, he asked, “Well, will you introduce us?” 

Iris shook her head determinedly. She gripped the counter harder until her nails made small indents in the cheap white Formica. “Not before I figure out what this something is.” 

A hunk of tomato fell out of the sandwich and onto the floor. With a mouthful of sandwich, Wally mumbled, “Oh, shit.” Iris rolled her eyes and stalked off to her room. “You’re not even gonna help?” 

Before shutting her door, she laughed. 

\----------------------------

The next day, Iris had to spend her time walking through campus for orientation tours. Before a meeting with her advisor, she got cozy in a couch in the student services building. 

Iris took out her laptop, noticing that it only had about twenty minutes left on its charge. She decided to spend these last twenty minutes absentmindedly scrolling through Twitter, at least until she remembered her determination of the previous day. She opened a new tab and stared at the empty search bar. 

“What to search, what to search…” she mumbled to herself, drumming her fingers on the space bar. She pursed her lips and simply typed, “Barry Allen Central City”. 

What came up as results were unprecedented. An archived Central City Picture News article from around the time of the particle accelerator explosion was the very first result. Iris cocked her head and clicked on the blue link. 

Her eyes skimmed over the headline, which read: _“Two-year-old son of CCU professor and recently deceased Central Real Estate CEO presumed dead.”_

Iris gulped. She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting, but it certainly wasn’t this. She scrolled down to find a very brief article denoting the facts and circumstances of the accident. 

_“After a lengthy investigation and extensive search throughout the spring of 1999, CCPD has found no evidence to convict anyone of the kidnapping and/or manslaughter of two-year-old Bartholomew Allen, son of Henry and the late Nora Allen._

_Dr. Allen reported his son missing less than a month after the unfortunate death of Nora Allen in December of 1998. Police has yet to imprison Dr. Allen for the potential death of his son, and it appears unlikely that they will ever do so. Typically, this wouldn’t be the case. However, in the midst of rebuilding Central City and its police force after the unforeseen consequences of the STAR Labs particle accelerator explosion, unsolvable cases are more often being set aside for others of higher precedence._

_Investigation will likely continue throughout the year.”_

Iris looked blankly at the phrase, _“kidnapping and/or manslaughter of two-year-old Bartholomew Allen”_. She first thought that this had to be a different Barry Allen, that it wasn’t possible that this could be the same Barry she had met in her apartment complex. That Barry had been alive and decently well. She then told herself that it wasn’t possible this could be another Barry Allen – after all, his first name was not exactly a popular one. Feeling uneasy, she bookmarked the article and returned to the search results page. 

The next relevant result was from a few months’ prior. It was a similar short archived article from the same source. Iris clicked on it. The headline read: _“Fatal accident: CEO and Founder of Central Real Estate dies as result of particle accelerator explosion, son and husband alive and coping.”_

Iris’s first thought was of relief that some clarity would be brought to her research. She scrolled past a few clickbait advertisements and read the article, subconsciously mouthing the words as she did so: 

_“On December 11, 1998, the STAR Labs particle accelerator unexpectedly exploded and caused hundreds of fatalities throughout Central City. Nora Allen, CEO and founder of Central Real Estate, was one of these victims._

_While Allen was on her way home from a typical day at the office, the particle accelerator was set off. The wave of energy forced Allen’s car off I-44 and into a ditch. The car was discovered upside down by emergency services shortly thereafter, where Allen was pronounced dead at the scene._

_Allen is survived by her husband, Henry Allen, and her two-year-old son, Barry. Donations can be made to the Families’ Fund, a charity meant to bring financial and emotional support to families of the victims from that night.”_

A picture followed the article of a white family. On a maroon couch sat a woman with vibrant red hair and thick black glasses, a half-naked laughing toddler, and a fairly young-looking man with graying hair and a tight smile. In the corner of the photo sat the date: 11/26/98. Iris let out a surprised exhale. This was taken on Thanksgiving, their last one as a family before Nora’s untimely death. 

Iris looked at the picture for a few minutes, analyzing its details. The toddler in the picture shared Barry’s light hair and icy blue eyes. She knew then that it had to be her Barry, that there had to be some explanation for the article discussing his potential death. Deciding that explanation would involve questions for another day, Iris bookmarked this article too and returned once more to the search results. 

Nothing else too relevant turned up on Barry’s search page, but Iris was still thirsty for information. There were still so many holes in Barry’s history. She thought it couldn’t hurt to Google Barry’s dad, and significantly more results came up. She clicked on the most recent article, which dated back to January 2000. 

_“CCU Professor disappears amidst taunts of filicide”_ , the headline read. Iris had to look up filicide, which Google defined as “the killing of one's son or daughter.” Iris was almost hesitant to continue reading, but for some reason she flipped back to the article page, despite everything telling her not to. 

_“Following an investigation into the murder and disappearance of two—year-old Barry Allen, Dr. Henry Allen of Central City University’s medical school too has disappeared. Not enough evidence was recovered during the investigation of the past year in order to convict Dr. Allen._

_When CCPD visited Dr. Allen’s apartment for a routine check-in last week, they discovered a pool blood in the entryway and with splashes also on the walls. When tested, the blood matched the Doctor._

_All of the Allen’s possessions remained in the residence, albeit for a few select photo albums police recalled seeing on the coffee table during other check-ins with Dr. Allen. A stuffed duck and fox that had belonged to Barry were also reported missing –”_

Before Iris could read any more, her laptop shut off, drained of battery. She frantically pressed the power button to no avail. She groaned as she clicked the laptop shut, quite irritated that it couldn’t’ve held out for just a few more seconds. 

Iris pulled out her phone to finish the article but had only unlocked it when her name was called. She swallowed her nerves, tucked the laptop and phone in her bag, and walked in the direction of the advisor’s office, who was waiting at the door.

“Hello there Ms. West, I’m Mrs. Li. I’ll be your advisor during your time at CCU,” said a friendly, middle-aged Chinese woman, who promptly walked across the room and stood behind her desk. She stuck her hand out to Iris, who smiled shyly and met it with her own. “Please sit.” 

Iris took a seat across from Mrs. Li in a plump black leather chair. She put her backpack on the floor and said, “Thank you very much for meeting with me.” 

“Not a problem at all. Today we’ll be setting your schedule for your first semester here. I see that you took three years of Spanish in high school. Two years of a foreign language is a graduation requirement, so would you like to continue with Spanish?” 

Iris had been pondering this very question since she finally took her very last Spanish final. All she really wanted was to get a fresh start at college, and she had never been very good at Spanish, so she shook her head no. “I was hoping to try something new.” 

“Was there anything you had in mind?” 

This was also something Iris had been thinking about. She’d always wanted to learn Italian, but there was something about French that was recently calling her name. “French, maybe?” 

Mrs. Li searched for a few moments on her computer. Still looking at the screen she replied, “There’s still five spots open in the French 101 class that meets Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from 9:00 a.m. to 10:20 a.m. Does this sound like something you’d be interested in?” 

Her father warned her not to take any early morning classes on Mondays, but she really wanted to take French. She tucked those warnings to the back of her mind and said, “Y-yes. That sounds great, actually.” 

“Perfect.” Mrs. Li typed a few things out before turning back to Iris again. “I see you have yet to declare your major, do you have any ideas of what you might like to do for it?” 

Iris’s mind went blank. She knew she should’ve been thinking about this for the past year or so, but nothing had really appealed to her thus far. “Is it okay if I stay undecided for this first semester?” 

Mrs. Li smiled slightly. This was a common occurrence amongst first year freshmen. “Of course. If that’s the case, then we’ll fill up your first semester with prerequisites. All freshmen are required to take a 100-level writing course during their first semester. Here’s a list of every Writing 101 course we offer and their respective descriptions. Why don’t you look that over and see if you can’t find one that works for you?” 

The advisor handed over a long, skinny piece of paper completely filled with text. Iris took it gingerly and opened her eyes wide, trying to focus but finding it rather difficult. Her mind kept drifting back to the news articles she had found prior to this meeting. Iris absentmindedly scrolled through the list, but none of them really meant anything to her until she came across one with the following description: 

“Section 52 of Writing 101 will teach students basic college-level writing skills before diving into basic fundamentals of reporting and journalism. Students will have the opportunity to be published in a campus newspaper, with the possibility of an internship after the course has been completed and passed. Recommended for first-year students interested in pursuing a career in a media-based environment.” 

Iris put the paper back down on the desk and placed her finger on the bolded “Section 52”. She pushed it over to Mrs. Li. “What about this one? 

At the sound of her voice, Mrs. Li looked down at the sheet and then back at her computer. A few clicks later, she said, “Lucky for you, there’s only one space open. Would you like to claim it?” 

Never more sure of anything, Iris nodded her head and giggled softly. Mrs. Li cracked another smile while she typed something else on her keyboard. 

“Excellent. Why don’t we move onto your math and science requirements?” 

Iris brushed her hair back and then put her hands in her lap. “Let’s do it.”


	4. Easing into Something

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A simple envelope forces our main characters together, and a revelation finally comes out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long, with homework and with the elections (gag) it took a while to edit my newest chapter. However - it's my longest one yet, so I hope you enjoy.

After the terrifying run-in with Wally, Barry decided to once again seclude himself in his apartment. He only left once a day to retrieve the mail, and he did this late at night to avoid running into anyone. 

One night, he was mindlessly skimming through one of his favorite childhood books around 11 p.m., snuggled inside his blankets on his bed. Suddenly, a knock fell upon his door. Barry knew at once it wasn’t Iris, even though he wasn’t anywhere near the front door. While Iris’s knocks were confident and powerful, this one was unsure and perhaps a little frightened. He assumed it was a late-night package delivery, so from his room Barry called loudly, “Just leave it at the door!” 

A familiar voice responded, “Leave what at the door?” 

It was Wally. In a panic, Barry dropped the book to the ground and leapt out of bed at once. How had he managed to run into one of the people he was trying so hard to avoid, without even leaving his apartment? 

Barry tiptoed around the corner to the front door and peered in the peephole. Wally was wearing a gray t-shirt and faded black jeans. Slapping a single envelope into his left hand again and again, he was clearly annoyed that this seemingly simple mission was taking a lot longer than expected. Barry noticed the logo of his father’s company next to the return address, and his heart started to race. 

“Sorry, Wally…is there something I can help you with?” 

“Yes. For some reason the mailman put this in our mailbox, even though it’s addressed to y–”

Nervously, he interrupting Wally and sputtered out, “If you could…could just slid that under…under the door…that’d be great, Wally. I have…a fever, or something. Or something. I just don’t want to get you sick…” 

Wally replied, “Sure thing. Feel –”

Having stepped away from the door waiting for the envelope to come sliding under the door, Barry didn’t see who showed up to accost him next. 

“Can’t even open the door for my brother, eh?” 

It was the sound of Iris’s voice that made Barry look back through the hole. She was standing with her hands on her hips, her head tilted up so her eyes could focus on the small circle Barry himself was looking into. Wally was sheepishly standing off to the side, having given Iris the letter, which was now slightly crinkled. She was smiling sarcastically and gripping the small envelope in her determined right fist. She had him backed into a corner, and they both knew it. 

Barry put his hands on his head and silently mouthed obscenities, completely at a loss for what to say. “I…I’m sick, that’s all. That’s all.” 

Without hesitation, she backfired, “Oh you are? Cause yesterday you looked just fine to me.”

“Yesterday? But I –”

“Yes, Barry, I saw you get your mail last night. I came inside when you got in the elevator. Not sure why you had to wait for Dr. Ellis to go upstairs, but…”

He somehow came up with, “Just came down with a fever this morning. Really knocked me off my feet. Been inside all day.” 

“And you can’t twist the doorknob anymore. Is that right?” 

Barry knew Iris wouldn’t give up until he opened the door and introduced himself to Wally. That, however, wasn’t going to happen anytime soon, or probably ever. He stood a few inches back from the door and stared at the floor, determined not to say anything more. About a minute or so of shuffling and whispering from the other side of the door went by. A piece of paper slid under the door to land at his feet. At first he thought it was his envelope, and that he had won this battle. Unfortunately, when he bent down and turned the paper over, a hastily written note was written on this underside. It read: 

_“Did some research, found some interesting things I’m sure people would be very interested in. Meet in the lobby tomorrow at 7 p.m. if you don’t want me to blab. Also – I’m holding your letter hostage until then. I don’t know who it’s from, but it looks important. -I.W.”_

A series of exclamation points infiltrated Barry’s mind, blocking him from producing any incoherent thoughts. What kind of research was she referring to? He couldn’t risk going, in case this was a trick of hers to meet her family. He also couldn’t risk not going, in case this research would put him in danger in some way. He also really wanted his letter, considering it could only be from one person. After all, Barry had spotted the insignia of his father’s company on the corner of the envelope. 

Making a tentative decision to go see Iris the next evening, Barry slid to the floor and stared at the ceiling, daydreaming until he somehow fell asleep. The floor was starting to be his closest friend. 

\----------------------------

Barry woke up twelve hours later, his back aching from spending the entire night on the floor. Groaning, he made his way to a standing position and stretched, his back bones cracking and his fists lightly brushing against the ceiling. Despite living alone, he locked himself in the bathroom and went through the motions of his usual routine. 

Afterwards, Barry walked across the hallway to his bedroom, where selected a pair of gray fuzzy socks for his cold feet. He sat down on his bed and slipped them on, watching them disappear the second he pulled them past his ankle. Standing up, he stretched once more and heard his spine loudly crack one again. Holding onto it like an elderly man, Barry shuffled over to the kitchen and grabbed a box of cereal from the kitchen cabinet. He doubled back to his room to grab a blanket and plopped down onto the maroon couch. Wrapped in the blanket, Barry turned the television on and flipped to the Food Network, which he would watch as he promptly consumed an absurd amount of cereal. 

\----------------------------

“Oh come on, how could you forget _eggs_ , you’re supposed to be making a freakin’ omelet!” Eight and a half hours later, Barry was still watching the same channel, the empty cereal box on the floor, long since drained. It was after this exclamation that he heard a knock at the door. Not only did this knock sound like Iris’s, but when he looked at the clock, it was 7:34 p.m., a half hour after he was supposed to meet Iris in the lobby. 

“Ah, shit,” he mumbled to himself before shouting much more loudly, “Coming!”

Barry zipped on over to the front door, tripping on a stray shoe in his hurry. He cried out in pain and hobbled over to the door, where he checked to make sure it really was Iris before opening it. There she was, holding a pizza box and tapping her foot in her usual impatient way. He focused on making his hand solid before opening the door and greeting Iris with as apologetically as he could. 

She gestured to the pizza box. “You didn’t show up, and at first I was mad, but then I remembered how weird you are and assumed something had distracted you.” Barry awkwardly looked in the direction of the television. “I was planning on taking you to dinner anyways, so I thought we could have a stay-in dinner. Cool with you?”

He was about to respond before she pushed past him. He chucked softly to himself before closing the door behind her. 

As he followed Iris to the kitchen table, Barry said, “So when am I gonna get my letter?” 

Iris placed the pizza box on the table and sat down in Barry’s usual seat. He was about to protest when she replied, “When you have a normal conversation with me that’s longer than five minutes.” 

Barry shook his head while he took plastic plates out of the cabinet. He slumped down in the only other chair, smirking just a bit while he doled out the plates. Iris opened the box on the table and picked the largest slice. It was a simple cheese pizza, and although boring, it was Barry’s favorite. He too took a piece and had bitten into it when Iris initiated their conversation. 

“So have you always lived in Central City?” 

Barry swallowed and put his piece on the plate. “I was born here, and when I was young I moved to Idaho with my dad for a while.” 

Iris almost choked on her own piece. “ _Idaho?!_ Who lives in… _Idaho_?” 

As he picked his piece back off the plate, Barry replied, “I did. For almost sixteen years.” 

Iris said, “Oh, well…what’s it like? I’ve never been there.” 

“No one has. It’s pretty boring, there’s nothing much to discuss about it.” 

“If you say so…” 

Barry shot back, “I do say so.” Iris laughed at this before polishing off her first slice. Barry crossed his arms and asked, “What about you, then?” 

She wiped her mouth with a napkin and grabbed another slice before answering. “I already told you, I thought?” Barry shrugged, and Iris sighed. “We lived in the suburbs my entire life, and this is the first time we’re living in the city. I’ve never lived anywhere else.” 

“What about your mother? You haven’t attempted to introduce me to her yet –”

She coughed nervously for a moment. “If you don’t have to talk about your dad, I don’t have to talk about my mom.” 

Barry nodded. Fair is fair, after all. 

“Did you have any friends in Idaho?” Iris asked, her eyes teeming with curiosity as they looked into Barry’s. He had to look away; even a simple type of intimacy like eye contact was something he definitely wasn’t used to yet. He was beginning to think that he would never be. 

He shook his head. “Not really. I was homeschooled, and we lived in a cabin in the middle of nowhere, so I didn’t get out much.” Barry felt pretty awful about lying, but he couldn’t find it within himself to tell her the truth just yet.

Iris put her elbow on the table and balanced her chin on her fist. “Yeah, I get that. I had a few close friends in high school, but they all thought they were too good for CCU, so I’m starting out fresh here. That’s kind of why I’ve been trying so hard to be friends with you, actually. You seem like a really sweet guy, now that I’m getting to know you.” 

He folded both of his arms on the table, feeling awful now about being so distant from this person who seemed to have nothing but the kindest intentions, albeit from her note from the night before. “I’d really like to be friends with you too, if you’ll give me another chance.” 

“Barry, I already have.” 

\----------------------------

Three hours and three slices each of pizza later, Barry and Iris were still talking. In this time, they realized they actually had a lot in common, but not enough that they kept finding out fascinating things about one another. 

“So you spend your free time watching Food Network? That’s actually incredible.” Iris sat back in her seat, folding her arms across her chest and giggling adorably. 

Barry shrugged his shoulders again, and internally rebuked himself when he realized how often he had done it since they started talking. “A lofty goal of mine is to be on _Chopped_ someday. I’m probably too much of a wimp to make it past the first round, but –”

“I think you would beat everyone before they even knew what was happening.” Iris sat forward and unfolded her arms. She looked at the empty pizza box and smiled, satisfied. Her eyes glanced over to the clock, and realizing it was close to 11 p.m., she jumped up at once. “Ack, I probably have to get going. I promised Dad I would wake up early tomorrow to start looking for part-time jobs. Need any help cleaning up?” 

Barry also stood up and looked around the kitchen. It wasn’t too messy except for the pizza box and dirty plates and napkins littering the table. “I think I’ll be alright.” 

As he moved to throw the discards away, he noticed she looked kind of sick. Concerned, he asked, “Hey, is everything okay?” 

Iris once again had her hands folded around her. Her eyes were looking down at the floor, and her mouth was shaped into a slight frown. “Barry, like I told you on my note yesterday – I did some research.” 

His stomach started to flutter. He had a vague concept of what kind of research she could be referencing. He took his hand off her shoulder and asked, “…Yes?” 

“I looked you up, Barry. I looked you up.” Barry took a seat back at the table, burying his head in his hands in his typical manner. “I found articles that told me about your mother’s death…I found others about your father and how he was accused of killing you…there was one talking about how your father’s blood was found all over your apartment, with neither of you to be found ever again…what does all of this mean? Why are you presumed dead by the Central City Police?” She took the letter out of her back pocket and looked down at it. “And you just told me you lived in Idaho with your dad. But your dad’s name isn’t ‘Mike Smith’, unless there’s something you’re not telling me…” 

Barry didn’t move for quite a while. He knew he had to tell her _something_ , but what? 

“I…” he didn’t get to say anything before a familiar meek knock sounded at his front door. With his voice cracking, Barry asked, “Who is it?” 

“It’s Wally.” 

Iris had some theories, but she had thought they were too wild to actually be true. However, in this moment, she decided she wanted to see something for herself. She looked straight at Barry, who was aggressively shaking his head, waving his arms, and mouthing “no” over and over. She stood up from the table and took a few steps forward. Turning to face the direction of the door, Iris called out, “Come in, Wally.” 

Barry jumped up and started to run in the direction of the door, passing Iris on the way. Eyes wide, he desperately whispered, “Iris, no! You can’t –”

Standing in the hallway connecting the kitchen and the front foyer, Wally looked straight through Barry to see Iris standing there terrified. “Who was that? Is someone there?” He picked up the nearest weapon he could find, which happened to be a tub of laundry detergent. He took just a few steps forward to stand right in front of Barry, who stood there, frozen and completely silent. “Iris, is he hurting you?” 

Iris shook her head. “No, Wally, he’s not.” 

Barry looked back and forth at the two siblings who were both so confused. Only he knew what was happening, and in that moment, he knew there was no avoiding this problem any further. “Wally…it’s me, it’s Barry…” 

Wally’s arms shot out in front of him when he moved to hold the detergent out in front of him as protection. In the process, he slammed the jug into Barry, pushing him down to the white-tiled floor. When he realized he had hit something but couldn’t see what, Wally screamed, “Who…what…what was that?!”

Iris rushed to stand by her brother. She purposely stepped over Barry, glaring at him as she put her arms around her brother. Barry was looking at them from the floor, his face contorted with frustration and fear. He didn’t dare utter a cry of pain, despite his upper torso aching. 

“Wally, Barry’s right there. Right in front of the stove, on the floor. What are you talking about?” 

Still holding onto the detergent, he shook his head while insisting, “There’s nothing there…there’s nothing there…there was a voice…but nothing there…” 

Barry was silent this entire time, looking up at the two of them. Tears were brimming in Iris’s eyes as she stared him down, and Wally was looking around wildly, trying to find the source of the strange voice that had come from nowhere. 

Still hugging her brother, Iris struggled to find words. She finally managed, “Say something, Barry!” 

Wally was shivering. “What are…who are you talking to?” 

Meanwhile, Barry was still perched on the floor, returning Iris’s glare. 

“Aren’t you gonna say something?” She whispered cautiously, both wanting and not wanting an answer. 

Wally shook his sister off, put the detergent on the floor next to Barry’s feet and grabbed Iris by the shoulders. Through teary eyes, Iris looked into Wally’s as he reassured him, “There’s no one here, Iris. Let’s go.” 

He started to walk her out the front door, but found it difficult, as Iris was struggling. “No…Wally…no! He’s right there! He’s right there!” 

Barry realized the pain he was putting Iris into by not admitting to his lies right there and then. “Wait, Wally.” 

Like a child frightened of a monster, Wally dropped Iris and pulled out his keys. He held out the sharpest one with one hand and protected Iris with the other. “Who said that?! Answer, damn it…”

Noticing the jug of detergent next to him, Barry focused his foot and kicked it across the room. It rolled to a stop in front of Wally’s feet. He dropped his keys and backed up to the nearest wall. He felt like he wanted to scream but that he suddenly couldn't. 

At last, Barry stood up and walked over. Iris had her eyes focused on him like a hawk. She wasn’t crying now as much as she was trembling. He put his shoulder on Wally’s shoulder and immediately noticed him tense up. “I’m Barry, and I’m invisible.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apparently I really like cheese and angst idk. Expect another chapter sometime between next Wednesday (11/23) and Sunday (11/27).


	5. Uncovering Some Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the last chapter - some angst, and we learn Barry's story (most of it).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking forever to get this one done (my timeline was between last Wednesday and today, so...pat on the back for that). enjoy ^-^

The world suddenly went black. Iris had been suspecting something along these lines, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t completely out of her element. Of course, she’d heard of metahumans before – they were always all over the news, and had been her entire life – but she had never personally known one in real life, as far as she knew. 

Wally stared straight ahead, his eyes not exactly focused on anything except the wall behind Barry. Barry himself looked at Wally desperately, as if hoping that with enough concentration Wally could see him. 

Iris could tell that her brother was both fascinated by Barry as well as completely terrified, and that he didn’t know which one to act upon. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Being her naturally curious self, Iris decided to speak for the both of them. 

“What do you mean by ‘invisible’? Why can I see you and Wally can’t?”

Barry took his hand off of Wally’s shoulder and Iris saw Wally take a sigh of relief. Barry turned around and placed his arm on the opposite wall, tucking his head under it. In a muffled voice, he answered, “I…don’t know. I don’t know why you can see me. No one has ever been able to, not since I was -” 

“Not since you were two.” Iris folded her arms and looked over at her brother, who was now looking down at his feet rather than at the wall ahead of him.

It only took those few words for Barry to lose his train of thought. He turned around and held onto the wall as he queried: “But…how did you know?” 

Iris replied, “That’s what all the papers said, that you disappeared when you were two. Wasn’t too hard for me to put two and two together.”

Barry himself folded his arms and looked down at the floor, almost mirroring Wally across the tiny hallway. “You’re quite the investigative journalist.” 

A few moments of silence passed, with Barry and Wally both staring at the floor and Iris taking turns looking at both of them. She was about to say something to break up the awkwardness when Wally did. 

“So why can Iris see you? There must be a reason?” His voiced cracked, and Iris moved to pat him on the back comfortingly. 

“Look, Wally…I don’t know. I just don’t. I can’t give you an answer,” Barry professed in an apologetic tone. Iris looked up only to make eye contact with the clearly distraught person in front of her. She felt her eyes go watery and blinked away tears before they came. 

Despite absolutely not wanting to leave, Iris felt like it was best. Barry probably didn’t want anything to do with them after tonight. She suggested, “Wally, I think we should go.” Moving her hand from Wally’s back to his forearm, they started walking in the direction of the door.

Wally shook his head no and shrugged his sister off. “No. I want to know more. I think we deserve that.” 

To be honest, Iris wasn’t sure if this statement was necessarily true, and what they exactly deserved from Barry. After all, he had lied to them, especially Iris, for the past two weeks. Did the situation call for lying? If she was actually being honest, Iris probably had to say yes. She then thought about if the situation was flipped. If she was in Barry’s position and had met someone who could see her, what would she have done? She couldn’t imagine that she would’ve handled it any better. 

After this debate with herself, Iris cast away her thoughts and aimed to be more open-minded. She was curious about Barry’s life, after all. The details she had uncovered had not exactly given her a full biography of the strange person standing in front of her. She voiced, “I want to know more too.” With a pit in her stomach, she remembered inviting Wally in even though Barry had definitely not wanted her to. She decided to add, “Only if that’s okay with you, of course. I don’t want to impede more than I already have.” 

She looked up to meet Barry’s eyes, which seemed to be looking at her, but were rather unfocused on nothing in particular. He closed them for a second and nodded. “That’s fine. You guys can stay. Just give me a minute.” 

Iris watched him walk towards a bedroom and close the door behind him. She and her brother exchanged looks, not exactly knowing what to do next. Neither of them had expected to make it this far. At last, Wally took initiative and crossed the room to sit on the maroon couch. Iris lightly smiled to herself at his tendency to make himself at home wherever he went. She followed and sat beside him. 

They waited, Wally humming a made-up song while Iris inspected her fingernails. When she realized it was going to probably be awhile, Iris inquired in a low voice, “What do you want to know, anyways?” 

Wally stopped humming while he thought for a moment. “I don’t know it’s just…so much to wrap your head around, you know? I’ve never really met a meta in my life, so this is kinda…” He hesitated, trying to find just the right word. 

“Bizarre?” Iris finished, also hesitantly. Wally shrugged, uncommitting. “That’s how I feel.” 

He nodded and absentmindedly put his feet atop the petite black ottoman which sat in front of the couch. At that same moment, the bedroom door opened and Iris hissed at Wally to move his feet. As the footsteps grew closer she started making desperate hand motions, but Wally just wasn’t getting it. She sat up in her spot and manually pushed his feet off the ottoman, and in return he gave her an offended glare. Barry came around the corner with messy hair and a pair of baggy blue sweatpants which had replaced the well-worn, not-so-blue jeans. He was also donning his usual white t-shirt, which upon Iris’s further speculation, appeared to be rather thin and flimsy. As if he were balancing on the edge of a cliff, Barry walked slowly and carefully. 

In a not so quiet whisper, Wally leaned over and asked Iris, “Where is he?” 

Barry wore a tight, forgiving smile as he sat cross legged in front of the black ottoman. “You know it’s not just Iris who can talk to me, right?” 

Wally leaned forward and set his elbows atop his knees, clasping his hands together. He stared in the general direction of Barry, but to Iris’s amusement, was about two feet off. “I’m aware, it’s just off-putting to ask a question to nothing in particular.” 

Iris winced, but Barry looked fairly unfazed. She assumed that he was used to feeling like nothing, which to her seemed like a sad way to live. She wasn’t quite sure what to do with this revelation besides feel melancholy and lonely for the person sitting in front of her. 

“I understand. What do you guys want to know?” 

Wally and Iris locked eyes, neither one exactly wanting to speak first. They opened their mouths at the same time, and realizing the other had done so, consequently shut them. This happened quite a few more times. Meanwhile, Barry’s eyes darted back and forth between the two siblings, not knowing which one to focus on. With occasional glances Iris could tell he was getting more impatient or, perhaps, more anxious by the minute, so she gathered her courage and spoke. 

“All I would like to know is the truth. What happened to you, what happened to your parents?”

The lights of Second Street shone outside of the window. Barry stared into the distance, presumably as he formulated what he wanted to say. Iris followed his gaze trying to see what he was looking at, and soon enough Wally followed suit. He leaned over again and mumbled, “What are we looking at?” Iris waved her hand at him and gestured to Barry with a quick head movement. Wally mumbled, “Oh.” They both sat back and waited for him to talk. 

Barry took a short, shaky breath and turned his head back around before he began to tell his story. 

“For the first two years of my life, we lived in an apartment down there.” He pointed down Second Street, and Iris peered out the window again, with Wally once again mirroring her. “The night of the particle accelerator explosion, my mother was in a car accident on the freeway. I was at home, with my father. Of course, I don’t remember any of this, I was only two.” Iris nodded along, mentally adding up all the facts that aligned with the article she found a few days prior. Barry noticed this and blushed. He coughed nervously and continued. “According to him, only a few days after her funeral I stopped being able to touch things. I couldn’t hold a toy car, I couldn’t hold a fork. He didn’t know what was going on, and he didn’t know who to go to for help. Before he had the chance to find someone, though, he came into my room one night when he heard me crying.” 

_”Oh, no.”_ Iris thought. This had been the part that had been missing from the articles she uncovered, and was therefore the part she was most curious about. She could obviously see where the story was going, and she was sure Wally could too. Following her internal monologue, she looked over at Wally, who had given up on trying to find where Barry was sitting and was slumped against the back of the maroon couch. His head was tilted back, and he was rapidly bouncing his right leg. Iris could tell that he was still paying attention, though, because he was wringing his hands in the same way as he does when they’re watching suspenseful scenes on TV. She focused her attention back to Barry, who was now hugging his knees into his chest and concentrating his gaze upon the black ottoman. 

“That night, he found my bed, empty. But I was there. I was crying. He never really told me what happened after that. I mean, I’ve read the online CCPN articles about the investigation into my murder and both of our presumed deaths. But, he never told me about this time personally, so there’s not much I can tell you about that besides these general details.” With a slightly disappointed expression, Wally tilted his head forward and stopped bouncing his leg. “I mostly just know that my father faked his own death so he could move us to Idaho, where he owns a berry farm.” He exhaled loudly. “Anything else you want to know?”

“Yes, actually,” fired back Wally. “How did you get back to Central City? And why come back?” 

Slightly taken aback by Wally’s interest, Barry placed his hands on the ground behind him, scooting back a few inches in the process. “I decided I’d had enough of the farmer’s life when I was eighteen and decided to move back here. My father agreed a lot more easily than I had been expecting. I figure that he probably wanted me out of the picture as soon as possible. After all, he’d had to live through sixteen years of hell taking care of me when he couldn’t actually see me, so…” 

In the moment, Iris felt quite bad for Barry. He’d clearly never confided in anyone in such a way before. His vulnerability was showing through his verbal and body language. She reassured him, “I’m sure that’s not true-”

“It is, Iris. You don’t have to be kind to me. I was pretty rotten to you.” 

She moved to sit on the edge of the couch and said, “Now I can understand why you acted that way, Barry…” His eyes moved from the floor to meet hers. So much was said between them without speaking in this moment that neither of them really acknowledged Wally when he snapped his fingers to get their attention. 

“I have more questions, if you’re up for it.” 

Iris started to protest, because she could tell Barry was weary from telling his story. He waved her off, though. “It’s okay, you can ask. I don’t mind.” 

Wally looked at his sister and raised his eyebrow, pleased that he was the victor of their insignificant battle. In return, Iris stuck out her tongue, making Barry laugh quietly. 

And for quite a while, Wally rapidly asked Barry dozens of questions, with Iris interjecting to ask one of her own every so often. Barry didn’t seem to get annoyed, to Iris’s surprise. He appeared to grow more comfortable as the minutes went on, and he spoke a lot more fluidly than he had ever before, really. This created a pathway for an easygoing conversation, which lasted for at least an hour. 

At that point, it was close to one a.m., and both of the West siblings had to wake up early the next morning. At this point in the night Barry was now laying on the floor, having grown uncomfortable sitting up on the floor. Iris herself was laying down on the couch with her feet propped up on Wally’s lap, while Wally’s were rested atop the ottoman, Iris’s worries about overstaying their welcome now irrelevant. 

Iris pulled her phone out of her back pocket when it buzzed its low battery tone. When she saw the time, she sat up and patted Wally’s knee. She said, “We should get going now, hm? Dad will be worried.” 

Wally made a “pfft” noise and countered, “Dad was asleep before I came over here, I’m sure he hasn’t noticed anything.” 

She sighed and stood up, holding her arm out to Wally to help him up as well. Unenthusiastically, he took it and stood up. Barry hoisted himself up off the ground and walked in the direction of the door. Iris gestured in his general direction and Wally followed the two of them to the front hallway.

“Hey man, thank you very much for telling us all about this. It must have been really hard for you to do that,” Wally said. 

Barry slipped Iris a smile, which, when she met his eyes, forced a grin out of her as well. He placed his hand on the doorknob and replied, “It’s no problem, Wally.” When he opened up the door Wally jumped back. 

“It’s gonna take me awhile to get used to that.” 

Iris held onto his shoulder and pushed him through the open doorway. Barry was standing on the opposite side of the door, squished in between it and the wall. His head resting teasingly on the thin edge of door, while his hand still held onto the doorknob. In a hopeful voice, he proposed, “Come back soon?” 

“Of course.” Iris gave him a closed-lip smile and shuffled out the doorway, looking back one last time before Barry closed the door behind him. She looked into the peephole, imagining Barry looking through on the other side. Though it was her idea to leave, it took a great deal of willpower not to go knocking on his door again. 

As they walked down the hallway, Wally noted, “He’s probably the most interesting person I’ve ever met.” 

Iris stared at the wall ahead of her, accidently mumbling out loud, “He certainly is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did they forgive him a little too easily? Maybe, but as I said in the comments of the last chapter (I believe...), this is a complicated situation. Be kind. 
> 
> PSA - no new chapter until at least next weekend. I've got an absurd amount of stuff to do next week.


	6. Job Hunting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our protagonists go job hunting. A new friend makes an appearance, because why not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking like six months to get this one to you guys...I was really shaken by a comment left on chapter five, and since I was using this fic to work out some of my anxiety, that comment really hurt more than I should have let it. That being said, I appreciate comments, but if you're going to say something mean without saying something that helps me be a better writer, don't write anything at all. I do this for free, everybody on this website does this for free. Don't be that asshole who writes mean things just to hurt people. (I am a real person, you know...and I have feelings). 
> 
> Also side note: I just got surgery last Thursday, and because of that I did not edit this as closely as I would have liked to. But I was really excited about posting an update to this, so here you go. I will keep updating this fic throughout the summer if all goes well, my goal will be to post a chapter every one or two weeks. I don't know how long it will go on, but we will see what happens.

Immediately after closing the door, Barry zipped over to his laptop, which lay on the floor in the middle of the main room. He opened up Chrome and tapped his fingers while it loaded. 

The internet was another one of those things that gave him comfort. There, no one knew his true identity, he didn’t have to reveal himself to anyone, and for brief moments he could pretend that he was anybody other than who he was. 

Barry opened Twitter and slid into his messages, where nothing was new from his longtime mutual, someone whose name was Cisco. They had been messaging back and forth for the past year or so. Before Iris and Wally, Cisco had been Barry’s only real friend, albeit a virtual one. Of course, he didn’t know Barry’s full story, but Barry hadn’t necessarily lied. Cisco knew that Barry lived alone and that he didn’t really have any real-life friends – which was essentially true.

Excitedly, he typed: “hey, sorry i haven’t written in a while. met some new people since we last talked, they just moved into my building. i think i might even be able to call them my friends.” 

While waiting for a response, Barry scrolled through his timeline. Nothing very exciting was going on because all of his mutuals were offline. Barry checked his messages one last time. Noticing that there was no response yet from Cisco, he shut his computer down and slid it across the floor. 

\----------------------------

One of the few perks of Barry’s life was the pleasant fact that he could sleep in as late as he wanted any day he wanted. That’s why when Iris came knocking on his door at 10 a.m., it took him a few moments to discern what was happening. Once he did, he noticed he had awoken on the couch, the top half of his body sunken through the cushions as if they didn’t exist at all. Pretty much accustomed to this type of situation, he gently guided himself out and slugged over to the door. 

Forgetting to check through the peephole, Barry opened the door to none other than Iris. She was wearing a summery yellow dress, and carrying a black purse that made it seem like she was ready to go out. 

She folded her arms and raised her eyebrows, asking, “What are you doing? I thought you were coming out with me.” 

While raising his arm to his head, Barry pursued his lips and shook his head. “You never asked me to go anywhere.” 

Iris matched his expression and responded, “I didn’t? Didn’t I say I was going job hunting this morning?” 

Barry replied, “You did, but you didn’t ask me to come with you…” 

“Huh,” she uttered. “I thought it was implied…”

“If it was, I must not have picked up on it.” He yawned and lowered his arm. 

Noticing he was still wearing the clothes from last night and that his hair was matted on one side, she spoke up. “Well, would you want to go out, you know, job hunting?”

He laughed softly and responded, “I would love to. But there’s a problem.”’ 

Iris lifted up her index finger. “Ah, I’ve got you covered.” She ruffled through her purse for a few moments and held up a Bluetooth headset. Raising an eyebrow, she said, “I went out earlier and bought it before coming over here.” 

Barry returned a quizzical look. 

“Don’t worry about it. Just…” Iris looked him up and down again. “…get dressed and meet me downstairs in twenty minutes.” 

Iris pulled the door closed for him and as he looked through the peephole, she was carelessly skipping down the hallway. He took a deep sigh and returned to his room to find something to put on that might even remotely impress her. 

\----------------------------

Approximately thirty-three minutes later Barry exited the elevator to Iris, who was looking somewhat annoyed. Barry could only look at her apologetically, since the Ramon family had gotten in the elevator on the third floor and the arguing brothers had pressed both the first and second floor buttons, despite the fact that the family wasn’t going to those floors. 

The parents didn’t do much to cease the arguments, which was unlucky for Barry. It had been getting rather hard to duck their punches in the small elevator spaces, so he was grateful when they finally reached the lobby floor. 

Iris got the point from his look and pretended to check her texts while the family made their way out of the elevator. One of the brothers gave her a once-over, and when the other one noticed, he smacked him in the back of the head. This led to yet another argument, upon which their parents had to manually separate the pair while they pried open the front doors. 

When there was no one left in the lobby, she playfully punched Barry’s arm. She huffed, “You’re late.” 

He awkwardly chuckled. “I was ready on time…” She pursed her lips in her usual way. Wincing, he continued. “…but I had to wait for Mr. Quincy to hobble out of the elevator and take his sweet time picking up his two grocery bags of food which had spilled all over its floor. Then I was finally on my way down when the Ramon family came in…” She squinted at him. “…And when the brothers were arguing, they pressed the first and second floor buttons, and you know how slow our elevator is, and…” 

She smiled and held up her hand to cut him off. “It’s fine, let’s go.” While putting the Bluetooth in, she walked towards the front door. 

Stopping her by turning her around, Barry asked, “So how exactly is that going to help?” 

She returned a devious glance and opened the door open for him. He cautiously walked through it and she followed suit. 

As they walked side by side down the street, Iris looked straight ahead and noted, “This headset is going to make it look like I’m talking to someone on the phone and not to thin air. You see?” 

Barry finally saw her genius. “I see.” However, with his tendency to notice problems with every solution to everything, a question brewed in his mind, which he had to voice. “But won’t people hear me talking?” 

She replied, “We’re on a public street. No one cares about what anyone else is doing. Just don’t talk in an empty, enclosed space and you’ll be fine.” 

Once again, he prepared to object, but when he studied the people walking past them on either side, he found that it was true - they really didn’t care about anything other than their own affairs. People were looking at their phones, chatting with friends, staring into space, or just generally invested in their own lives. 

Armed with a newfound relief, he looked sideways and acknowledged her idea. “I see what you mean.” 

She beamed with satisfaction, still looking straight ahead. “You should really listen to me more often.” 

“I really should,” Barry said. “So where are we going first?” 

This stopped Iris in her tracks. She had forgotten to plan out the order of shops that they were visiting. She stopped walking for a moment and dug through her purse. Now that they were right next to each other, Barry could actually see how much was crammed in there, which included various lipsticks, sunglasses, her phone, and other items Barry couldn’t put a name on. 

After a few minutes of ransacking, she yanked out a crumpled piece of paper. A list of stores and restaurants was scrawled upon it, as if she had been in a hurry while composing it. She studied it for a few minutes, as did Barry. Places like CC Jitters, an independent clothing shop, and the iconic neighborhood pizza shop were some included on this list. 

As Barry waited for Iris to say something, a middle-aged man in a hurry nearly bowled right into him. In a panic, Barry jumped behind her, only to almost get hit by another person. 

Iris turned around, amused that someone as tall as Barry was using her rather short frame to protect himself. “What exactly are you doing?” 

“The guy was about to, he was gonna –” Deciding that more excuses would end up with him stuttering some more, he gave up and moved to stand on her other side. “Never mind. Where are we going?” 

She glanced over the list again. “I was thinking we can go to the pizza place first? It’s the furthest away, and we can just make our way through the rest on our way back home.” 

He nodded and looked dreamily into the distance. “Free pizza would be nice.” She glared at him, but his stupid expression only ended up making her laugh. 

\----------------------------

“So we’ve gone to Marco’s Pizza, the froyo place on Fifth, the clothes store on Sixth, the campus bookstore, even the pet salon next door to the bookstore, and none of them are hiring?!” Iris looked at her list pathetically. They were now sitting on a bench outside said pet salon off of Fourth Street. 

Barry shrugged. “I mean, it is already mid-May, a lot of people already hired their summer help…” 

Digging through her purse for a pen, Iris sighed, “Not helping.” 

“Yea, sorry.” Barry said coyly. “Still getting used to the whole ‘communicating with other people’ thing.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Iris said as she crossed off the pet salon. After she did so, she looked up, perusing Fourth Street for any other place that might be hiring. All she saw was the park, with the trees finally growing emerald green leaves and the tulips finally blooming purple, pink, and orange. Older people walked through the greenery, feeding pigeons and holding hands. 

Observing how she was looking at the park, Barry noted, “It’s the most perfect place to relax, to be quiet. I go there all the time to escape my apartment.” 

Iris nodded. “I’ll have to visit sometime. Now, however…” Her eyes returned to her list, where a few stores were yet to be crossed off. 

Barry pointed to a spot on the paper that listed the local coffee shop, CC Jitters. “Why don’t we try here? It’s not too far away, and I hear their coffee’s the best in the city.” 

She continued to stare at the list before agreeing. “Alright then. Let’s go.” Realizing she didn’t yet know where Jitters was located, she asked, “Will you be my guide?” 

Barry stood up and held out his hand. “Of course.” She took it and held it close to her side so people wouldn’t think much of it. Enjoying the sunshine, the pair started heading in the direction of the coffee shop. 

\----------------------------

About twenty minutes later, they walked out of Jitters, a job application tucked in Iris’s ambitious hand. 

“Finally, I have something to bring home to bring home to my dad that proves that I actually did something today.” She was beaming and hugging the paper gleefully to her chest. 

Barry wasn’t sure how to or even if he should respond, so he just chuckled in agreement and nodded in his usual way. 

Continuing to talk into the Bluetooth, Iris said, “It’s also only two blocks from our place, which is super convenient.” 

They started walking home side by side, this time not really holding hands. Iris was going on and on about her excitement, while Barry kept to himself, relatively quiet. Being out of his apartment for so long brought a lot of feelings to the surface, some he couldn’t even put a name on. 

“Are you okay? You haven’t really said anything.” Iris took a break from talking into the Bluetooth to look at him, as there weren’t many people walking near them on the sidewalk. 

He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pocket. They were just a few steps away from their building, and he just wanted to get back inside after this long day. “I’m fine, just being outside for so long is…” 

“Difficult?” She finished. 

While that seemed like a bit of an understatement, Barry agreed. “It can be. For sure.”

Forgetting that anyone could look out their window and spot her, Iris linked arms with Barry and laid her head on his shoulder. “Well, just know that I’m here to talk whenever you need me. So is Wally, for that matter.” 

Before he could respond with gratitude, they were standing at the front door of their apartment. A figure wearing a dark coat walked through it, and before they turned in their direction Barry could tell who it was. He recalled the back of this person’s head from another time he saw it. 

“Hey there, baby,” Iris’s father said as he made his way to kiss her on her head. “I was wondering when you’d be home.” 

Before he was frozen in his spot in fear, Barry carefully unhinged his arm so Iris wouldn’t have to awkwardly do it. She snuck a quick glance at his face, which was burning more and more by the second. He started to step backwards towards the door, praying that someone would open it for him. All he wanted was to retreat into the safety and solitude of his apartment. Though he’d had a wonderful day walking around the city with Iris, he couldn’t shake those conflicting feelings he’d attempted to dodge just a few moments earlier.

“Yea, actually, this job hunting spree didn’t go as well as I’d hoped. But, look.” Iris gave Joe the application, to which he responded with a high-five and well wishes. 

“I’ll see you at home in an hour or so, I’ve gotta sign something at the precinct.” Joe ruffled Iris’s hair and walked in the opposite direction towards the police station. 

No one had come to Barry’s rescue. Iris held the door open for a few moments, not exactly looking at him, which he took this as a cue to speed through it before he was locked out of the building. 

When they entered the lobby, a gaggle of people were just getting in the elevator. Iris had wanted to inquire more about why he was acting strangely, but now, she realized, she couldn’t. 

As she too was about to get in the elevator, she heard a whisper in her ear. “I’m just gonna take the stairs. Too many people.” He nudged his head in the direction of the stairs. 

Iris tried to appear nonchalant when she waved off the people, one of whom had been holding the door open for her. She walked over to the mailboxes and pretended to open hers, and when the elevator closed shut she followed Barry up the elderly stairs. 

They were about to start up the second flight of stairs when Barry nearly knocked right into someone roughly around the same age of them. He noticed it was actually one of the Ramon kids, and he was preparing to climb the rest of the stairs when the kid spoke up, startling Barry at first. 

“You must be new here. Hi, I’m Cisco.” Barry’s eyes widened and alarm bells rang through his mind, but Iris didn’t take notice. Could this be his online friend, or was he just being paranoid? 

Iris shook Cisco’s hand which he had offered out to her, which Barry noticed stuck out from a Star Wars shirt, a topic that they often talked about in their Twitter discussions. 

“Hi, I’m Iris. I actually just moved in with my family. Fourth floor.” 

In a joking tone, Cisco replied, “Ah, okay. I’m in 3A, if you ever find yourself bored and lonely.”

Iris simply said, “We’ll see,” and followed up with a friendly grin before walking up the remainder of the steps on that flight. 

Cisco nodded to himself and nonchalantly said, “See ya later.” He too continued on his way going down the steps. 

Iris passed Barry, who was spread-eagled against the wall, barely breathing. “You coming?” She asked. 

He peeled himself off the wall and said, “You know…I’ll be up in a few minutes.” 

Before he could exactly take note of Iris’s response, Barry seemed to jump down at least five steps and almost trip over the rest. He followed the kid named Cisco to the front lobby, where he was rummaging through his pockets, presumably for his keys. Cisco opened up his mailbox, took out the few letters that were shoved in the small space, and continued back up the staircase. Barry was close behind, trying not to be too loud with his footsteps. 

When they reached the third floor, Cisco pulled out his phone and opened up Twitter. Barry’s chest started to throb. Cisco opened his direct messages, and there at the top was Barry’s username. Barry bit his hand to stop himself from audibly responding. Cisco leaned against his front door and typed the following into the message box: “dude, me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to reiterate: if you're going to write something mean, phrase it in a way that makes me be a better writer. don't insult me or my fic for your own personal pleasure. it takes a lot of courage to post your writing on a public website (especially someone like me, who has anxiety and uses writing to ease that...), and if you're reading these fics you should really understand that. 
> 
> once again: DON'T BE A JERK FOR THE SAKE OF BEING A JERK. 
> 
> thank you everyone ^_^


	7. Trust in Each Other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wally opens up, and the bond between friends strengthens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I suck at chapter summaries, but there's a lot of dialogue in this chapter (ongoing scene, actually), which is new for me. Enjoy ^-^
> 
> Also - I really needed something light, fluffy, and refreshing after 3x23 and to kick off our five month hiatus, so that's what this chapter essentially is to me.

Iris wanted to chase right after Barry to ask what was going on with him, but decided against it. By now, she liked to think she knew him better than to expect him to compliantly fess up. She trekked up the next two flights and walked in the direction of her apartment. 

Right now, since Wally’s school was still in session for the next few weeks, Iris hadn’t been expecting anyone to be home. When she tested out the doorknob, though, it opened. 

“Hello?” She called out. “Who’s home?” 

No one answered. Apprehensive, Iris walked down the main hallway, peering through each door. No one was in any of the rooms. 

“Is anyone here?” She was both confused and slightly scared. Deciding that her dad must have forgotten to lock the door, she made a mental note to tell him about it later. 

Iris returned to her room and kicked off her shoes, both of which accidently clanged against her closet door harder than she had expected them to. About a second later Iris heard a sharp intake of breath come from somewhere near. She put her ear against the closet door and heard someone breathing heavily on the other side. Thinking she knew exactly who it was, she pounded once on the door with her right fist, around the height of where Wally’s head would be. 

An “Ow!” escaped from inside the closet. Iris smirked and opened it up to Wally, who was rubbing his temple. 

In a huff, he grumbled, “You know you didn’t have to hit it so hard.” 

Iris maintained her smile. “I didn’t.” Remembering that it was in the middle of a school day, she folded her arms and questioned, “So why aren’t you at school?” 

Avoiding eye contact, Wally shuffled around the bed and nonchalantly gazed out the window. He mumbled, “Half-day.” 

Iris could spot the lie from a mile away. She used to always use that excuse on her father all the time in high school. So much, in fact, that he printed out the school’s calendar, blew it up, and attached it to the refrigerator. 

“Are you sure about that?” Iris posed this question as she too made her way to the window. Because he was taller than her by about six or seven inches, she purposely attempted to interfere in his line of sight. 

Wally continued avoiding her gaze as he focused on a woman being dragged down the sidewalk by her rowdy dog four stories below. He sighed and covered his face with his hands. “No. I skipped.” 

“Why’d you skip?” Iris asked. Before he could reply, she remembered something else that was bothering her. “Also, why were you hiding out in my closet?” 

Shaking his head, Wally pleaded. “Don’t make me answer that.”

He uncovered his face to see Iris looking at him, her eyebrow raised and her lips pursed. Being quite familiar with this particular face of hers, he thought he knew where her mind was going to. “Are you gonna tell Dad I skipped if I don’t tell you?” 

Iris didn’t move and didn’t say anything. If anything, a hint of a smile appeared on her face. 

Seeing no way of avoiding her power of curiosity, Wally trudged over to her bed and sat down. He faced Iris, who was now leaning against the wall. “Okay, fine. I was in your room because your room is the only one with a decent view of the front entrance, and I wanted…” 

She slid down the wall and watched him struggle to come up with the right words. “You wanted…to?” 

Mumbling again, Wally said, “I wanted to make sure you got home okay, that’s all.” 

It was in that moment that Iris realized how much her brother really cared for her, despite their regular quarrels and frequent teasing. “Why would you think I wouldn’t get home okay?” She crawled over to sit cross legged in front of her brother, who was clearly very embarrassed by this situation. 

As Iris held Wally’s hand, he whispered, “You know…we don’t know this Barry guy, and I just…I just…” 

Iris wasn’t sure if she was expecting this to be his answer. She cradled his hands and said, “Barry’s actually a really nice guy, you don’t have to be afraid of him.” 

Wally shrugged his hands out of hers and placed them atop his knees. He retorted, “Easy for you to say. I don’t know what he looks like. I don’t know how you can possibly trust someone you can’t put a face to.” 

To an extent, he did seem to have a valid point. The two of them had only discovered Barry’s secret less than twenty-four hours before. For that matter, Wally hadn’t even talked to him before last night. 

Iris reached for his right hand again and continued stroking it. For a few moments, they sat there in silence before Iris broke it. “Would you like to know what he looks like?” 

Wally nodded and then when he looked and saw the mischief in her face. “Wha-”

She grabbed onto his hand and pulled him. For being smaller than him, Iris was actually quite strong.

On their way out the door, Iris snatched the spare key from one of their couch’s side tables. 

“Where are you taking-” Wally queried as she continued pushing him out the door without much protest at all. When they were in the hallway, Iris closesd the door and made a point to show Wally the key before locking up. 

“Lock the door next time, even when you’re inside the apartment. You don’t know who could be lurking around in a big city.” 

Wally was about to respond with a firm “Okay” but didn’t get the chance. After locking the doorknob, she took him by the hand again and pulled him across the hallway to apartment 4D. She knocked and called out, “Barry, you home?” 

After about forty seconds of awkwardly waiting, Wally started to tiptoe backwards towards their apartment. Iris snatched him by the hand again and shook her head. 

“Sometimes he takes a while to come to the door, he’s weird like that.” 

Almost on cue, the door popped open. Barry stood there with a blank stare. He didn’t say hello, and he didn’t ask why they were there.

“Okay, Wally…” Iris took Wally’s left hand that she was holding onto and put it on Barry’s left shoulder. She skirted to his other side and put the other hand on Barry’s other shoulder. 

“This is so weird,” Wally remarked. He was smiling in a strange way, as if he were both overwhelmed and overjoyed. Keeping his eyes locked on roughly the area where Barry was standing, he took his hands down and folded his arms across his chest. 

At this point, Barry still wasn’t being responsive, but he wasn’t exactly receding back into his apartment either. 

Iris clapped her hands together and said, “Now, Wally…right now Barry is… staring aimlessly at the floor.” Wally looked down at the floor. “His hair is dark brown and purposely messy – you just want to run your hair through it.” Wally raised an eyebrow. “His eyes are the purest blue – you feel like you could go swimming inside them.” Wally squinted; Barry stared at nothing. “His lips are thin but long, and when he smiles…” She sighed. “You feel as if you have no other choice but to as well.”

“Can we speed this up?” Wally asked, generally interested in what Iris was saying but visibly uncomfortable at the same time. 

“Yeah, yeah.” Iris shook out her hair and refocused. “He’s also pale, as if his skin has never seen the sun. He’s skinny, even more than you, and lanky. His arms are long and so are his legs; he’s about as tall as you.” 

Wally nodded. Alright, alright, he thought. 

Iris took a deep breath in, and exhaled. “Is there anything else you want to know?” 

“How old does he look?” 

“He’s my age, Wally.” 

“Yea, but sometimes people look older than they actually are.” He shrugged. 

Iris made a hmpf noise and looked back at Barry. Now, his eyes were wide, though he was still gazing at the floor as if it were the only thing in the world. She waved her hand in front of his face and exclaimed, “Barry!” 

All of a sudden, his head shook and he covered his hands with his eyes. “Ach, I’m sorry. Something weird just happened…” 

“You can thank Wally for that.” Iris responded. 

Offended, Wally’s mouth snapped open, his jaw having dropped. “Last time I checked, you dragged me over here.”

Barry shook his head again. “It wasn’t you guys –” Iris smiled victoriously at Wally, and he at her. “-though that was weird.” The siblings’ faces fell. 

“What else happened?” Wally asked the empty doorway. Iris nudged him, and he cried out in pain as he did before. “If we may ask,” he added, so Iris would stop glaring at him. 

“No, it’s cool.” Barry said. “Why don’t you guys come in?” 

Iris nodded and made her way into the apartment. Hesitant at first, Wally moved to follow when out of nowhere, the trio heard a familiar voice. 

“Wal, who are you talking to?” Joe questioned as he stepped out of the elevator. Being wrapped up in their conversation, they hadn’t noticed the elevator open. Joe started to walk over but Wally met him in the middle, while Barry and Iris hid behind the half-open door. 

“No one, dad. I was just…trying to meet the neighbors. We’ve already been here for a few weeks and we don’t really know anyone yet.” Wally’s excuse was feeble, but Joe bought it. 

“You know, I actually wanted to do that too. Who lives here?” Joe started to walk towards Barry’s half-open door. 

During this whole conversation, Iris was standing right up against the door, her ears peeled. Barry too was listening intently, but by this point, he was standing at least five feet away by the opposing wall. When Joe voiced this question, the two of them tensed up. 

Wally grabbed him by the elbow before he could make it very far. He said, “You know, I actually needed your help with something. At home.” 

“Oh, okay…” Joe replied, slightly befuddled by Wally’s anxious grip and insistence on going back to their apartment. 

As they walked away, Iris faintly heard her dad ask, “Why aren’t you at school?”, to which Wally responded yet again with, “Half-day.” 

Once they heard a door open and close, Iris and Barry were able to relax. Barry closed his own door and headed out towards his balcony, despite the incoming storm clouds. Iris exhaled the breath she’d been holding onto for the past several minutes and followed him excitedly. 

Barry leaned against the balcony, his forearms resting on the thick cement. He looked out at the city dreamily. It was out here, when Iris joined him outside, that she really took the time to fully see each one of his features. Under the glare of fluorescent lighting and with Barry’s utter lack of focus, she hadn’t taken much care in doing this. 

What a shame, Iris thought as she too leaned against the balcony, that someone like him is hidden from the world. 

Out of nowhere, Barry queried, “Remember Cisco? From the stairwell?” Now, he was examining the empty space where his arms were, his face giving off the aura that he wasn’t feeling too great. 

“Yes, of course I do. It was only a few–” 

“I already know him.” Barry closed his eyes and grimaced as he said these words. 

Iris was shocked. She thought that she was the first person who could see him. “Wh-how?” 

Shaking his head and keeping his eyes closed, Barry responded, “From Twitter. We’ve been talking for the past year or so. I had no idea that I actually had seen him in real life…until twenty minutes ago.” 

Iris grabbed onto Barry’s right shoulder and exclaimed, “Barry, this is great news! Why do you look like you’re gonna hurl right off this balcony?” 

He opened his eyes and peered into hers, which were looking at him with hope, comfort, and wonder. “I don’t think it’s a good idea to invite more people into my life. Not when it’s screwed up in the way that it is. It’s bad enough that you and Wally –”

“No. Don’t you go there. Having friends is okay, it’s healthy, even for someone in your situation. Cisco seems really nice, too.” 

Barry looked at the ground and nodded his head slightly. “He is, I know he is. I’m just scared, I think.” 

Iris asked, “Scared of what?” 

“Scared about the first hello, and going through the motions like I did with you and your brother.” 

“I can help you, if you want,” Iris volunteered. She flashed him a comforting smile, and he couldn’t help but give one in return. 

“I would. But I think I’ll need some time before we do anything.” 

The color was starting to return to his face, and his arms was perched back on the edge of the balcony. Now that he was looking more stable, Iris moved her hand and matched his position. “Of course,” she replied. 

They stood there right next to each other, their arms lightly touching. Iris noticed how his felt like it was just barely there. It felt like something more than a hologram, yet something less than a real person. 

Barry was about to pose a question when a thunderclap sounded. 

“Do you think we should go inside?” Iris asked. She wasn’t one to appreciate the rain. 

Barry squinted up at the sky and shook his head. “I think we’re fine for now. Maybe when we see lightning we should, though.” He closed his eyes again, and when he had the courage to ask her his question he opened them. “Do you think you could describe how I look, you know, to me?” 

Iris glanced at him for a moment. He wasn’t remotely spaced out now. In fact, he looked desperate, as if he needed this in order to keep on living. “You didn’t hear me describe you to Wally?” 

Barry scrunched up his face and said, “Not really. I didn’t really feel like I was on this planet during that whole thing.” 

Iris wore a tight smile when she said, “I understand. Look at me.” 

He faced her, and vice versa. She analyzed him for a second before she formulated what she wanted to say. 

“You’re strong, stronger than you realize. You carry yourself like if you knew your strengths, you would be the most confident person walking down the street.” She paused. “Your hair is straight, but it’s messy, in an almost purposeful way. It’s the color of tree bark, and your eyes are about the color of robin eggs that would rest inside that tree.” She paused again to look deeper at his eyes. It seemed like he was holding onto her every word. “When you look closer at them, you can spot out small specks of green. Green the shade of leaves before they blossom into flowers.” 

Iris stopped again, a little embarrassed. In no sense was she remotely used to analyzing a person in such minute detail, but she knew how much this meant to him. 

“Keep going, you’re doing phenomenally.” He grinned, chuckling softly. 

A small smile crept across her face, and she continued. “When you smile, your entire face is lifted up. Your eyes sparkle, your nose furrows, and your freckles seem to dance across your cheeks.” 

“I have freckles?” 

“Yes, you…wait-” Iris had never entertained the idea that Barry might have never actually seen what he looks like. She’d assumed that at least he would have been able to. “You’ve never known that?” 

“No.” He smiled sadly. “My mom had freckles, you know. When I was young, I didn’t have them.” 

“Oh?” Iris couldn’t think of what else to say. She was in shock of the life Barry had so far led. As a young adult or even as a kid, he’d never even seen himself. For more than fifteen years, no one else could either. 

“Yeah. It’s nice to know that-” He was interrupted by another clap of thunder, upon which it started to pour down rain. 

Already soaked through, Iris asked, “Can we go inside now?” 

“Of course.” Barry walked past her and opened up the screen door for her. 

Before walking in after her, he closed his eyes and tilted his face up towards the sky. He lifted out his hands and turned around in circles. Iris didn’t know what he was doing, but she let him have these few moments to himself.

“What was that about?” Iris asked him, as she wrung out her hair and he came through the door.

Barry shut the screen door, and replied, “Getting wet, the rain…it makes me feel…” He struggled to find the right word. “Like my body’s really here. Like I’m…” 

Iris finished for him. “Real.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> friendly reminder: constructive criticism is helpful, being a jerk is not. don't be mean for the sake of being mean. positive comments are always amazing to read, as well. 
> 
> will try to get on an updating schedule, but life is unpredictable. i'll aim for every or every other Tuesday/Wednesday, but it will depend week to week. 
> 
> hope you enjoyed. ^-^


	8. New Adventures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A simple trip to 7/11 turns into a life-altering night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my longest chapter yet by about 300 words. some fluff and some important plot stuff. enjoy ^-^

A few days later around 10 p.m., Iris came over with Wally and Barry’s father’s envelope. All of them had forgotten about it after Wally and Barry’s initial meeting. 

“I’m sorry, Barry. I had it in my pocket the whole night…I just forgot about it when it was time to leave,” Iris said meekly as she handed the envelope over. 

Barry took the envelope from her and replied, “It’s fine, thanks for bringing it over.” Taking note of Iris’s laptop and Wally, who was standing behind Iris with his hands in his pockets, he added, “You can come in if you want.” 

Upon receiving his permission, the siblings walked into his apartment. Iris made her way into the kitchen, but as Barry was closing the front door behind them he noticed Wally examining the main room. Barry was about to ask if he could help with anything, but he figured Wally was just being curious. 

Barry went to follow Iris, but didn’t realize Wally too moved at the same time. They collided and the envelope fell out of Barry’s hands to the floor. Before Barry had really registered what happened, Wally had leaned over and picked it up. 

Sheepishly, he apologized. “Sorry, man.” Wally awkwardly held out the envelope and Barry took it from him. He had also smiled with gratitude, but realized too late that Wally obviously wouldn’t be able to see it. 

By this point, Iris was already sitting at the table with her laptop open. She hadn’t noticed what had happened. For some reason, Barry was silently thankful for that. 

Wally sat down in the spot next to her and put his earbuds in. Barry crawled into the seat across from him, where his computer was already open. Before Wally and Iris had gotten there, he had been attempting to formulate an adequate response to Cisco’s message. He couldn’t figure out why this was freaking him out more than it should. 

Shaking his head, Barry decided to instead focus his attention on his father’s envelope. He had an idea of what it may be, and would have held off on opening it had Iris not started excitedly watching him. 

Concentrating on making his hand solid, Barry opened the envelope, and out fell two pieces of paper. He picked them up to find that one was his monthly rent check, and one was a brief note, written on the back of index card. 

The note simply wrote, “Call me.” Barry showed it to Iris, who acknowledged it with a curt nod and squinted eyes before going back to whatever she was working on. 

Barry knew his father had something important to tell him. The monthly checks typically came with letters about what his father was up to and questions about how Barry himself was doing. Because they didn’t talk often, the letters were quite extensive, often covering three or four pieces of paper. Never in Barry’s recent memory had a letter from his father said something as simple as “call me.”

And yet despite this, Barry didn’t have much of an intention on actually calling his father. Barry was dreading what he might say, although he had no reason to suspect that he would say anything too bad. With a deep exhale, Barry set aside the envelope and went back to crafting his message to Cisco.  
He kept reading Cisco’s last message over and over in his mind. 

_dude, me too._

It was a very simple message that Barry just could not think of a response to no matter how much he wracked his brain. He had, however, gotten the courage to finally type out a response. He tapped Iris on the shoulder, who looked up from her own laptop with a “Hm?”

Barry slid the computer over to her and requested, “Could you read this over and see if it’s a good response?” 

She peered at the screen and read his response out loud. “Neat.”

As he wringed his hands together, Barry asked, “How does that sound?” 

Iris winced. “Well it’s…succinct.” 

He took the laptop back from her and grabbed at his hair with his hands. “It sucks, right? It sucks. I just can’t think-”

Iris interrupted, “Barry, I think you’re overthinking it. It’s fine.” 

Barry shook his head. “No, it’s not. It sucks, I know it does.” He reached over and tapped Wally on the shoulder. Wally jumped. His phone fell out of his hands onto the floor, which caused his earphones to be yanked out of his head. Throughout this, Iris was giggling. 

“Jeez, I’ll never be used to this.” He groaned and picked up his phone, checking it over to make sure it wasn’t cracked. “What do you want?” 

“Should I send this?” Barry stood up, picked up his laptop, and walked around the table to where Wally was sitting. He plopped it in Wally’s lap, who was observing the flying laptop with wide, fearful eyes. 

Wally, who was rather familiar with Barry’s recent dilemma by this point, read the message and raised his eyebrows. He side-glanced at Iris, who was watching him expectantly. 

Anxious, Barry was lightly hopping up and down where he was standing. He posed, “So?” 

Wanting to get back to Reddit, Wally pressed a button on the keyboard and closed the computer. 

Barry felt the blood rush from his face. In a low tone, he inquired, “What did you just do?” 

Wally twisted his face into a half-smile and gently glided the laptop back onto the table so Barry could see for himself. Barry opened it up and frantically pressed the space bar in an attempt to make the screen load faster. When it did, he noticed that the button Wally had pressed was the ‘enter’ key. Now, Cisco would see his message and likely respond to it. 

Exasperated, Barry pushed his laptop a few inches across the table and asked, “Why…just, why?” 

Wally shrugged and replied, “You needed to chill. Maybe now you can.” 

Iris chimed in. “Of all people, do you really think Barry would be the type to chill?”

As he put his headphones back in, Wally noted, “Probably not, but he needs to.” 

Barry’s jaw clenched. He fell back down into his chair and cradled his knees to his chest. “You know, I can hear you.” 

In support, Iris got up from her spot and stood behind Barry. She placed her hands on his shoulders and massaged his tight muscles. “You know, Wally, I’d be careful if I were you. What with Barry being invisible and all I’m sure he could do some evil shit to you and you’d never see him coming.” 

Wally waved her off. “He’s too nice.”

Barry closed his eyes grimaced as Iris’s massage dug deep into the knots in his back. Through the pain, he mumbled, “Still here.” 

“Still too nice.” Wally smirked. 

“You know what…” Barry started, but stopped when he opened his eyes and saw that Cisco had replied to his message. 

_what are your new friends like?_

Barry’s heart skipped a beat. He shut his laptop and said, “You know, I want to go out.” 

With his headphones in, Wally didn’t hear him at first. Iris, however, put her elbows on the table and folded her hands underneath her chin, intrigued. Barry never expressed a desire to leave his apartment.

“To where? It’s already…” Iris checked the clock on her computer. “Ten-thirty.” 

Barry thought for a moment, and admitted, “I’ve never had a slurpee.” 

Upon hearing these words, Iris’s mouth fell open. “Never?” 

He shrugged. 

“Fair,” Iris replied. She tapped Wally’s shoulder, who then took out an earphone and lifted an eyebrow. “We’re going to 7/11. Wanna come?” 

He shook his head and shut off his phone. “No, I think I’ll head home. At least one of us should be back before midnight, for Dad’s sake.” 

“Okay, Wal,” Iris said. She closed her laptop and handed it to Wally. “Can you put this in my room?” 

Wally stood up from his spot before taking it from her. “What time should I tell Dad you’ll be home?” 

Glancing at Barry, who was cross-legged in his spot, Iris answered, “Not sure yet. Tell him not to worry.” 

“Alright. See you later.” 

In an attempt to be courteous, Wally held out a friendly hand. Barry didn’t notice this at first, but after Iris gently nudged his shoulder he looked up and what she was referring to. He quickly stood up, focused his hand, and shook Wally’s. 

“Ye-yep. Come back anytime,” said Barry. 

With that, Wally bid Iris goodbye and left, firmly closing the front door behind him. 

Tapping her hands on the table, Iris asked, “Ready to go?” 

“Maybe.” Nervous, Barry added, “Do you need to grab the Bluetooth first?” 

Iris stood up, grabbing Barry’s hand as she did. “No, we’ll be fine.” 

\----------------------------

“You know, it’s a nice change of pace to have the girl open the door for the guy,” noted Barry, since Iris was holding 7/11’s front door for him. Despite Iris’s knowledge that 7/11s are typically empty at this time of night, she had spotted an annoyed-looking clerk standing behind the counter, and another customer browsing the chips, their back to the pair. 

“Oh, ha,” Iris responded sarcastically. They walked through the door, the clerk giving Iris a noncommittal nod. She led Barry to the far end of the store, where the slurpee machines churned in unison. “Now, I usually get Coke with a bit of cherry. What do you think you want?” 

“That sounds fine,” Barry said. “Could you actually…” He made the motion of grabbing down on the drink machine’s handle. “Please?” 

“Oh, oh yeah, of course. Sure,” Iris agreed. 

“Now you’re starting to sound like me,” Barry said, his mouth curving into a smile. 

Iris couldn’t help but return the smile, accompanied by a chuckle. “Guess that’s what I get for spending so much time with you.” 

She grabbed a cup from its holder and made Barry’s slushy. She put it to the side and took out another cup. When she grabbed down on the handle, a familiar voice exclaimed, “Hey there!”

Iris finished filling up the cup, released the handle and looked at Cisco, who had been the mystery customer. He was holding a slurpee of his own. She smiled politely and said, “Oh, hi.” 

Barry detected a hint of disappointment in her voice, but he couldn’t quite figure out why. He himself was, admittedly, a little irritated that Cisco had interrupted their time together. Alas, there was nothing either of them could really do about it, because Barry had still not decided on telling Cisco about him yet, after all. 

“What are you doing here alone so late?” Cisco asked. 

Iris put lids on their drinks and slid a quick glance to Barry, who had shoved his hands in his pockets and was staring at the floor. She lied, “Just getting slurpees for me and my brother. He didn’t feel like coming.” 

Barry silently raised an eyebrow and slid past Cisco to analyze the chips for himself. Iris watched him wistfully as she grabbed two straws and picked up the drinks from the counter. 

Cisco said, “Oh, cool. Didn’t know you had a brother.” He took a sip of his slurpee and walked to the cashier with Iris. Barry noticed them moving and he followed a few feet behind them. 

Iris pressed her lips together and made a _mhmm_ noise. She put down the drinks, quickly gave four dollars to the clerk, and said, “Keep the change.” To Cisco, who hadn’t yet paid, she added, “Meet you outside, ok?” 

He mumbled an okay as Iris picked up her drinks and leaned back on the front door. Barry slyly slipped through it, throwing a quick glance at Cisco, who was looking at Iris, perplexed. The two of them huddled together on the empty sidewalk, and Iris apologized. “Sorry about this. I wasn’t expecting him to be here.” 

Barry shook his head. “It’s okay. To be honest, it’s amusing to watch you tiptoe through conversations, pretending that I’m not there.” 

“Amusing for you, maybe,” Iris muttered. She took a sip from her slurpee. “Are you sure you don’t wanna tell him about you?” 

Barry shook his head and looked inside. Cisco was picking up his drink from the counter, about to come outside. “I’m not ready.” 

“When will you be?” 

Barry shrugged with a sigh. “I-”

“Should we go?” asked Cisco, stepping dangerously close to Barry, whose eyes seemed to fall out of his head in his startled state. 

“Yeah.” Iris took another sip as the two of them walked side by side. Thankfully their apartment was only a few blocks away, so Iris didn’t have to think of too much conversation filler. 

“So, are you going to school here?” Cisco prompted. 

Iris lowered the straw from her lips. Barry nonchalantly walked about ten feet ahead of them, looking at the stars. She answered, “Yeah, I’ll be a freshman at CCU in September. What about you?” 

“Cool. Next year I’ll be a sophomore there. Majoring in engineering, but I haven’t decided which kind yet.” 

“Impressive,” remarked Iris. In the distance, she could see their apartment building. They just needed to cross the street and walk another block over. “I haven’t decided on my major yet.” 

“What are you interested in?” 

She took a second to think about this question, as they were walking across the long crosswalk. She liked reading, and she loved writing. Before she could answer Cisco, though, she noticed Barry was walking backwards, looking at her and grinning like an idiot. She smirked back at him and was about to answer Cisco’s question when she noticed a bike rider start to cross the street from the other side. He was headed right for Barry, who was unaware that he was in any sort of danger. 

It all seemed to happen in slow motion. Iris shoved the drink cups at Cisco and rushed over to Barry, who had now stopped in his place to watch her in confusion. She grabbed both of his arms and pulled him to the side, just in time for the biker to pass over the spot where Barry had been standing. Bewildered, the biker turned around to see what this girl had been attempting to do. In the process, he almost bowled right into Cisco, who leaped out of the way at the last second. 

Iris and Barry held onto each other, staring in horror at Cisco. His jaw dropped, and before he could yell anything, Iris stammered “W…I…We can explain. Let’s just get inside.” The two of them proceeded to run as fast as they could, hand in hand, towards their apartment building. 

Though Cisco was completely taken aback, he bolted after them, the three slushies hugged to his chest. 

\----------------------------

“Was it the particle accelerator?” Cisco asked shakily. The three of them were now back in Barry’s apartment, having had an awkward encounter in the elevator and an even more awkward ride up the elevator. Iris and Barry sat next to each other on the maroon couch, gripping onto their drink cups. Cisco paced in front of them, his drink melting. 

“Basically, yeah.” Barry wasn’t afraid to speak up in front of Cisco anymore, now that he knew. 

“What’s it like?” Cisco stopped pacing and just stood, staring at the empty space that Barry occupied. He was able to judge where Barry was sitting solely based off of the floating drink cup.

Barry took a sip of his slushy, which too was melting but still tasted delicious. He answered, “It’s not fun.” 

Pursing his lips, Cisco peered around the rather barren living space, much like Wally had done earlier. His eyes fell upon a vintage Captain America comic book, one of the few things Barry had actually framed and put up on the wall. 

Cisco noted, “You know, I have a friend who has this same comic. He sent me a picture of it once. Wait-” He looked back at the couch, where Barry was wincing, his straw clenched between his teeth. “Are you…” 

“Ralph from Twitter?” 

Yet again, Cisco’s mouth fell open. “So the reason why you don’t have a lot of friends, and how out of nowhere you finally found some…” 

_Mhmm,_ Barry mumbled. 

Cisco put his hands on his head and knelt down in front of the couch. “So of all people, why can she see you?” He took one of his hands off his head and pointed at Iris, who glanced up when she heard him ask this question.

Barry shrugged, forgetting that Cisco couldn’t see him do so. “I don’t know,” he voiced aloud. 

“Isn’t that something you want to know?” 

Iris and Barry shared a look, and Iris stammered out, “W-of course. I don’t know how we’d figure that out, though.” 

Cisco proposed, “Well we could start with the particle accelerator explosion. It gave Barry invisibility, and it might have given you –”

Interrupting him with a laugh, Iris scoffed, “Wait, you think I’m a meta?” She gazed over at Barry, who was chewing on his bottom lip.

Cisco shrugged. “Can you think of any other explanation?” 

“No,” she grumbled. When she began to think further about this possibility, it made more and more sense, except for one thing. Iris continued, “Because how could I have gotten powers if I wasn’t in Central City during the explosion? My family lived in Coast City until I was five, the explosion happened when Barry and I were two.” 

They stirred in silence for a few moments until Barry queried, “Are you positive you weren’t here?” 

Cisco wagged his index finger in Barry’s direction, wanting to know the answer to this question himself. 

Iris frantically looked between the two of them. She laughed, “I’m-I mean, I could have theoretically been here…but we’d have to ask my dad.” Her eyes met Cisco’s, which turned out to be a fatal mistake. 

He exclaimed, “Well then we need to ask him!” 

“It’s really not that important to me…” Desperate, Iris looked at Barry, who, to her dismay, seemed like he was up for observing a conversation with Joe. She added, “I think what’s important is not why I can see him, but the fact that that _I can_.” 

“I mean, yeah. But come on, Iris. What’s the harm in asking him about this?” Barry pleaded. A strange curiosity had now arisen within him, and he suddenly wanted to know the answer to the question Cisco had bravely asked. 

“Yeah, what’s the harm?” Cisco teased with an irresistible grin. 

“I…I…have to go.” Iris jumped off the couch, her drink in hand. She raced to the front door, and when she opened it she found Wally sitting in front of it, a glass to his ear. When she grabbed Wally’s arm with her free hand, she glanced up to find Cisco and Barry staring at the two of them, amused. Groaning, she slammed the door shut behind them. 

“Who was that?” Wally questioned as he wrestled free from Iris’s tight grasp. 

Opening their own front door, Iris murmured, “I’ll tell you later.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> usual reminder that I love comments (even though I don't always respond to them), but rude comments with no constructive criticism are helpful to no one. please don't be mean for the sake of being mean. 
> 
> not sure when the next chapter will be up, but I hope you enjoyed this one. ^_^
> 
> Edit on June 22, 2017: I've just started writing the ninth chapter, and I apologize sincerely to those who are waiting a long time for the next one. I just began my internship last Monday and it's taking up six-seven hours of my life Monday through Friday. Doesn't help that I like to do a lot of my writing after midnight and I haven't been staying up late because work starts at nine a.m. 
> 
> tldr: next chapter should be up shortly! I can't tell you when because I don't know myself. writing takes a lot of work, and I want to make this story at least decent for you guys to read. hope you understand ~
> 
> edit july 18, 2017: i'm steadily making my way towards 3k words. honestly I don't have much of chapter 9 yet because I've both hit writer's block and i'm also now working 6 days a week. if you have ideas on what you'd like to see in the next chapter comment, it will help me write faster! sorry again.
> 
> edit july 29, 2017: I've gotten past my writer's block, chapter nine is almost done. i'd say to expect it within a week, maybe even just a few days.


	9. Interesting Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iris meets a new friend, and the crew figures out why Iris can see Barry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so sorry this took like seven weeks to get out. Not only had I hit writer's block, but I also had started a job that took over my entire weeks. 
> 
> However, with that said, this is the longest chapter I've yet to write for this story, so I hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> I'm not sure when the next chapter will be out, but it won't be more than two or three weeks, I will promise you that right now. 
> 
> if you're reading this chapter, thanks for sticking with me.

“I’m going to the store. Do you guys want anything?” Iris asked. She shrugged her purse over her shoulder and folded her arms, staring at the three boys in front of her. They had all been focusing their full attention on some show she’d never heard of before, and as a result, they were totally ignoring her. 

After a few moments of waiting, she got impatient and stepped in front of the television. All three of them protested in their own way. 

“We’re watching something!” cried Wally. 

Cisco yelped, jumped off the couch, and crawled around Iris in order to position himself right in front of the television. 

Barry, on the other hand, sat on the couch, arms folded and eyes glaring silently at Iris through squinted eyes. When her dad was home, Barry always kept completely quiet. 

“Fine,” she grumbled. “If you don’t want anything, I won’t-”

“You know what I like,” Wally barked as he strained his head in an attempt to to see the television.

Iris rolled her eyes. This was probably the best answer she was going to get. “Barry?” 

He shook his head, and waved for her to move out of the way. 

“Fine, enjoy your…” Iris gestured at the television noncommittedly and finished, “…whatever.” She moved out of the way and the three of them let out a collective sigh. Cisco shrunk back to his spot on the couch, accidently smacking Barry in the face as he did. 

“Hey!” 

“Sorry.”

Iris giggled. As she walked out the door, she called out, “I’ll be back later, Dad!” She closed the door behind her and shuffled over to the stairs. Recently, she hadn’t felt much like taking the elevator. 

While walking down the stairs, Iris tucked in her earbuds and pressed play on her phone. Feeling at peace with the world, she strolled through the lobby and then down the sidewalk with her hands in her pockets and a content smile dancing across her face. She had convinced her friends to drop their quest to find out about her past, not to mention she had heard back from Jitters just the day before. After an interview with the head manager, they were going to give her a job, her first actual, paid job. She was thrilled and jumpy, especially since her first day was rapidly approaching. 

A little less than ten minutes later, Iris turned the corner onto Seventh Street, somewhere she’d had yet to venture before. The first thing her eyes focused on was the Central City Picture News building. She nearly cried at the sight – for at least the past five years she’d been dreaming about writing for a real, professional publication. Here, just fifty feet across the street, was one such publication. 

Temporarily forgoing her excursion to the store, Iris pulled her purse in close and bolted across the crosswalk just as the orange hand started to flash. 

Excited, she walked right up to the window to the left of the front entrance and looked in. Reporters were sitting at desks, writing notes, having editorial meetings – all in front of Iris herself. Seeing it all in person reinforced something that she always suspected – she wanted to be a writer.

Iris’s eyes focused on a sign in the window which bore Picture News’ logo and bold text reading “Posting for Editorial Intern”. Enticed, she inched closer and read further. It was an unpaid position to her dismay, but that wasn’t exactly what turned Iris off about the job. Underneath the salary (or lack thereof), Iris read aloud the following: “Must be currently enrolled in an undergraduate program in journalism or a related field.” 

She sighed unhappily. She hadn’t started college yet, and she doubted that they would take an intern who had graduated from high school just mere weeks prior to applying.

Almost on cue, a friendly voice from behind said, “You should apply. It’s a great program.”

Iris whipped around at the sound of the voice. It was a girl around her age, carrying a large stack of paper in one hand and a coffee from Jitters in the other. She was wearing slick black pants and a crisp white shirt, which bore a nametag reading “Linda Park” on it, followed by “Editorial Intern”. 

“I take it you’re one of their interns?” Iris asked. 

Linda smiled and nodded. “Could you tell?” 

Iris pointed to her nametag and Linda commented, “Oh yeah, obviously. Somehow I always forget that’s there. So are you going to apply?” 

Adjusting her hair anxiously, Iris replied, “I don’t think so. I don’t think I’m ready for an internship like this. I haven’t started college yet.” 

“Ah,” Linda acknowledged. “You should definitely check back after you have.” 

“I will, thanks,” Iris agreed. 

Linda peeked inside, where an older man was looking out at her and tapping his watch impatiently. 

“I have to go,” Linda said apologetically. “Hope to see you back here soon.” 

Iris smiled shyly back in response and started to walk back in the opposite direction, towards her original intended destination. She felt over the moon. 

\----------------------------

As soon as Iris left, Wally paused the video. It had been a recording they’d been watching – they had just been anxious for Iris to leave. The three of them huddled together and started whispering. 

“So, we know the plan?” Cisco asked confidently. He’d been spending more and more time with the group since he met them two weeks prior. Steadily, he was feeling more and more one of the squad every day. 

Barry looked around and mumbled, “I sit in the corner and stay quiet.” 

“You?” Cisco referred to Wally. 

“Yeah, I take turns with you asking the questions. When we get into dangerous territory, we stop.” 

“Awesome,” Cisco grinned. “Are we ready?” 

“Let’s go,” Wally said. He stood up and walked over to his father’s office.

Shaking, Barry also stood up and moved to sit in the corner, facing the couch but far enough away that Joe couldn’t exactly sense his presence.

Staring in the spot where he heard Barry slid down the wall, Cisco asked, “You okay?” 

Barry swallowed hard and tucked his head further into his knees. “I just don’t think we should be doing this without Iris. It doesn’t seem fair to her.” 

“Dude, you know she would never have wanted to find out the truth, and anyways, you know why we have to do this.” 

Barry peeked up at Cisco, who was slouched on the couch as if he owned it. “Why is that?” 

Cisco started to answer, but stopped when he heard Joe’s voice in the hallway. “Sorry, man,” Cisco apologized. 

“So why does your friend want to see your baby pictures?” They faintly heard Joe ask. 

“He’s weird, I dunno,” Wally replied. 

When they turned the corner, Barry’s heart started thumping as it always did whenever he was close to Iris and Wally’s father. 

“Hi there, Mr. West,” Cisco sucked up to Joe. 

Joe lowered his glasses, and stared Cisco down, who returned the glare with a sheepish smile. As he slid them back into place, Joe simply said, “Call me Joe.” 

“Okay, sir!” Cisco responded, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. Barry winced and propped his elbows on his knees. 

Joe crossed over to the bookshelf on the other side of the room and took out a thick, cream-colored photo album labeled “1995-99”. Hesitant, he handed it over to Cisco and started to leave the room.

“Wait!” Wally shouted out. Barry lifted his head up at the outburst. “Don’t leave.” 

“What? You can’t look through it yourselves?” 

Wally tried to speak, but nothing intelligible came out. Cisco, though, managed to find something to say. 

“I just wanted to spend some time and get to know you, that’s all. You seem…like a cool dude.” 

Joe raised his eyebrow. “A…what?”

Taking control, Wally pushed his father forward and said, “Ignore him, just sit down.” He made sure to shoot Cisco a confused face, which Cisco returned with a wink. 

“Whatever,” Joe mumbled. He sat on the opposite side of the couch, and Wally awkwardly sat in between them. 

For once, Barry was thankful he couldn’t be seen. 

\----------------------------

Iris was wandering through the aisles of the small convenience store, not sure what she was looking for outside of Wally’s golden Oreos. Honestly, she had wanted an excuse to get out of the house, especially since, besides Barry and Cisco, she still hadn’t made too many friends since moving downtown.

After about ten minutes of aimlessly strolling around the shop she went to stand at the cash register, Oreos in hand. A man about a foot taller than her wearing a green trench coat stood at the counter. Iris noticed something strange, though. The cashier was talking to the man’s thighs, rather than looking at his face. 

“P-p-please, sir. I’m s-s-so h-h-ungry,” The man sputtered, tears pouring from his eyes. “M-m-mommy hasn’t fed m-me since y-yesterday, a-and I don’t have any m-m-m-money.” The man rubbed at his eyes with his knuckles and bent his head over pathetically. 

Iris thought she was hallucinating. The sight of this man acting like a child was too bizarre. 

Sadly, the cashier looked at the man’s thighs. Reluctantly, he reassured the man. “Okay, okay. Take the Twizzlers. It’s fine.” 

The man looked up at the cashier and, through sobs, said, “T-the Sp-prite t-too?” 

The cashier sighed and answered, “Fine. Just don’t tell my boss I let a little girl scam her out of five bucks, kay?” 

_Little girl?_ Iris thought, incredibly confused. _Why the hell would the cashier be calling this grown man a little girl?_

The man immediately stopped crying, and smiled brightly at the cashier. He exclaimed, “Kay!” and grabbed the candy and the drink off the counter before skipping out the door. 

As she watched the man leave, a sudden epiphany struck Iris. 

“Ma’am, can I assist you?” The cashier drummed his fingers impatiently on the counter. The woman in line behind Iris tapped her foot on the ground. 

Feeling lightheaded, Iris tossed the cookies in the cashier’s direction and bolted out the door. Her eyes immediately found the man, who was still skipping down the sidewalk. 

As Iris watched him from across the street, something even weirder than a man pretending to be a little girl happened.

Out of nowhere, Iris saw a flicker of a little girl, blonde and wearing a pink dress. Before she could finish her thought, the man flickered back to his six-foot tall, trench-coated self. It was as if her mind was trying to explain to her why she could see Barry. 

Iris reached her hand to her head, which was throbbing. She had to get home as soon as possible.

\----------------------------

“Ooh, what’s this one from?” Cisco pointed to yet another picture. 

It had been about a half hour of looking at pictures, and neither Cisco nor Wally had had the nerve to ask Joe anything. Barry was getting rather annoyed with staying trapped in the corner. He stood up to stretch. 

“It’s from the day of the particle accelerator explosion,” Joe replied grudgingly. 

At the sound of the words “particle accelerator”, Barry’s ears perked up. He could tell that Joe too was getting rather annoyed, but Barry could also tell that Cisco and Wally were finally getting somewhere. 

“Oh?” asked Wally. He and Cisco made eye contact and nodded at each other. “What were we doing that day?” 

“Well, this is us at the entrance to STAR Labs.” 

“What were we doing there?” 

Joe nodded his head in Wally’s direction and answered, “Your mom worked there, you know.” 

Wally, who only saw his mother a handful of times per year, rubbed his head anxiously. “I didn’t know that.” 

Without being prompted, Joe continued speaking. “She was…brilliant. Without her structural designs, the explosion could’ve hurt a lot more people. Maybe thousands.” 

“So we were definitely in Central City the day the accelerator went off?” Wally confirmed eagerly. 

“Yes.” Joe caressed the photo sadly, and Barry felt the blood in his head drop. He had all but confirmed it a few moments before, but hearing the definite answer scared him. “She was never the same after that day.” 

Now interested in the photograph, Barry tiptoed behind the couch. He took a close look at the picture. In it was a younger Joe stood there, a giggling little girl standing in front of him. Next to them, a woman just as tall as Joe held a baby. They were all standing in front of the iconic STAR Labs sign, decked out in signs celebrating the particle accelerator. 

“What do you mean?” Cisco wondered aloud. 

“After what happened to Iris…Francine just…never…” 

“What happened to Iris?” Wally spat out. 

Joe looked at him, stunned by his sudden and rather random eruption. Gingerly, he responded, “She was in a coma for a few months.” 

At the same time, Cisco and Wally inquired, “How many?” 

“A little less than four.”

“And you never told us this because?” Now, it was Wally who was the annoyed one. This was a pretty big deal, and he couldn’t fathom why his father might want to keep this from him. Barry placed a comforting hand on his shoulder but Wally flinched, not knowing that Barry had moved from the corner to behind the couch. 

“I’m not obligated to tell you everything, young man.” Joe sighed and put the photo back in the album. He closed the book and handed it back to Cisco, who was in awe and consequently silent. “I need to go.” 

Just when he stood up from the couch, the door opened. Iris came in, holding her head and groaning. When Joe saw her, he rushed over and held her shoulders. 

“Baby, are you okay?” He pulled her close and rubbed her back. In too much pain to answer immediately, she buried her head into his chest. Wally and Cisco were still sitting on the couch, staring absentmindedly at the book in Cisco’s hands. Barry was watching Iris and her father, wanting to comfort her as well but knowing he couldn’t at that exact moment. 

“Hm?” Joe asked again, rather concerned.

Somehow, Iris said, “Just a headache. I’ll be okay.” 

Joe stepped back and looked her up and down. “You sure?” 

She nodded, and stopped when it seemed to aggravate her headache even more. “I’m just going to lie down.” 

Still worried, Joe advised her to take an Advil. When she agreed, he pulled away from her and walked back to his bedroom. When he shut his door, Iris started to make her way towards Barry. 

As she stumbled across the room, though, the same weird thing from before started to happen. Barry started to flicker before her, just like the man in the trench coat. Except that Barry wasn’t turning into other people like the man, but he was simply disappearing altogether. Her head was hurting so much that she closed her eyes and stopped walking. 

“Iris?” Barry quietly prompted. He moved forward a few feet to hold onto her shoulders as Joe had done. She was swaying, looking as if she could collapse at any second.

Iris struggled to open her eyes. When she could, no one was standing in front of her, though she felt a familiar pressure on her shoulders. She forced out, “B-B-Bear…” 

She heard Wally cry out for her, and she felt herself tumble into an invisible friend’s arms, and those were the last things she remembered happening before falling victim to the headache. 

\----------------------------

“She’s waking up.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah, dummy. Her eyes are opening.” 

“Hey, look-”

“Oh, shut up.” 

Squinting her eyes, Iris hoarsely whispered, “No, you shut up.” 

“Iris!” Wally cried out. From what she could tell, she was laying on the couch, and he was kneeling next to her, holding onto her hand as she had done for him that day he hid in her closet.

“What happened?” Iris asked. Her head was no longer pounding, though when she tried to sit up, it felt like she had dipped it in a vat of concrete. 

“Just lay down, Iris.” Barry’s voice said. “You collapsed.” 

Iris felt like she wanted to cry. “Oh great, I still can’t see you. I-”

“Could the reason for that be that I’m standing behind you?” 

“You…what?” Iris tilted her head back to see Barry looking down at her, smiling blushingly. “Stop smiling, I’m in pain. Is Cisco still here?”

Barry answered, “He had to leave, something about a family emergency. What happened to you?” 

Iris closed her eyes again, turned her head flat, and responded, “I was at the store. There was a man, who wasn’t a man.” 

Barry queried, “Well if the man wasn’t a man, what was he?” 

“He was standing in front of the cashier, begging and crying for free food. He was acting like a little girl, and the cashier was treating him like a child…but he was a man.” 

Barry peered down at Wally, who looked just as confused as Barry felt. He asked, “What do you mean?”

Iris sighed, her headache starting to pick up again. “I mean, I think he’s a meta. A meta that can look like other people.” 

“But if that’s the case, why didn’t he look like a little girl to you?” The second Wally spoke these words, the pieces started to fall into place for him, as they did for Barry. What Iris voiced aloud next was exactly what they’d assumed after hearing her story and Joe’s answers. 

“I now understand that I’m probably a meta too. I wasn’t ready to accept it a few weeks ago, but…but I think…” She drifted off, her train of thought lost in the abyss of her pounding skull. 

Putting years of watching detective television shows to good use, Barry added, “What I think is that you can see through the effects of the particle accelerator explosion. Maybe you might even be impervious to the powers of metas, too.” 

“Yeah, maybe…” She curled onto her side, pulling her hand away from Wally’s and tucking it into her chest. 

Taking the cue, Wally stood up. He grabbed the dark green fleece blanket from the back of the couch and whispered to Barry, “I think we should let her sleep. We can talk more tomorrow. I’m assuming you can show yourself out?”

Barry didn’t respond, since Wally immediately Wally made his way out of the room. He himself was about to leave when he heard Iris mumble, “No, stay.” 

Granting her wish, Barry walked back around the couch and sat on the floor in the spot previously occupied by Wally. He gently rubbed her back until she fell asleep, and somehow, he did too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> friendly reminder that I appreciate your comments, and that if you decide to comment, be kind. if you have criticism, don't be a jerk. 
> 
> thanks again for reading, have a wonderful [insert here].


	10. A Familiar Angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pent-up emotions get the better of Barry, and Iris starts her job at Jitters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm the actual worst at updating - I know I promised an update like a few weeks ago but I was traveling for nearly two weeks at a time, then it was my birthday, and then school started...but anyways, here's a chapter now. And it's the longest one yet, as a gift for me being super late on this chapter.
> 
> Also the science in this story from here on out is total nonsense, for the record.

Hours later, Iris awoke feeling leagues better. Her head was no longer pounding, and when her eyes focused she noticed a box of chamomile tea on the coffee table, along with a brand-new jar of honey and a note that read, “For when you wake up” in Wally’s chicken-scratch handwriting. 

With a smile, Iris moved to sit up. As she put her feet on the ground, she felt something move. 

“Ow!” 

Realizing too late that she had stepped on a sleeping Barry, Iris looked down at him and apologized profusely. “Oh my – Barry…I’m so so sorry. I didn’t see you there.” 

Barry perched himself onto his elbows and gave her a half smile. He said, “It’s okay, I’m used to it.” 

“I didn’t mean it like that,” Iris professed, burying her face into her hands. 

“Calm down, it’s fine.” After Iris moved her feet back onto the couch, he stood up and stretched. “Last night was something, huh?” 

Iris huffed. “I vaguely remember coming back to the apartment last night, everything after was a bit of a blur.”

“Do you remember your conversation with Wally and me?” 

“A bit. I remember you telling me I collapsed, and I also remember that we came to the conclusion that I have some sort of meta power.” She laughed ironically, shook her head, and rolled up the blanket into an unkempt ball. “It sounds so ridiculous saying it out loud.” 

Peering up at Barry, who looked sadly at the floor with his hands hastily stuffed in his pockets, Iris asked, “What’s with the sour face?”

Not quite being used to hiding his emotions yet, Barry mumbled, “Shit.” 

“Hmm?” She prodded, moving the blanket to the side. 

He knew he had to admit to what had been wracking his mind all night. “Something about what you said last night has been bothering me.” 

Iris’s eyes met his. She couldn’t remember exactly what she had said. “What did I say?” 

Wincing, Barry said, “You said that you _still_ couldn’t see me. What did you mean by ‘still’?” 

Now, Iris’s swore under her breath. Memories of Barry disappearing before her eyes flooded her mind. He had no idea what she had seen, or rather, what she hadn’t seen. 

“What did you mean, Iris?” Barry queried in a low voice, his hands subconsciously floating anxiously to the sides of his head.

Iris, startled by his change in tone, shifted her eyes back to Wally’s box of tea. She admitted, “Right before I collapsed, I couldn’t see you anymore. I knew you were there, but you…weren’t.” 

Barry had been expecting an answer akin to this one. He took a step back and turned to face the wall, standing right up against it. To support his head, he balanced it on his forearms. 

“Bear?” Barry faintly heard Iris ask, her voice quivering slightly. When he didn’t answer, she said, “I don’t know what’s going on, I don’t. But like I said already, what matters is that I can see you now, and that’s what’s important.” 

Barry shook his head. Though he’d only known Iris for a handful of weeks, she was probably the most important person in his life at the moment. Lightyears more important than his mother, whom he’d barely gotten the chance to know. Probably even more than his father, who had no idea how to raise him and, as a result, left him alone for most of his childhood. He couldn’t fathom what would happen if the only person who could see him, who had ever seen him, couldn’t anymore. 

“What? Why are you shaking your head?” Barry heard Iris get off the couch and take hesitant steps towards him. “Hey, I’m here.” 

“But for how long?” Barry blurted out impulsively, his worries getting the better of him. He turned around and slouched against the wall, taking Iris in with fearful eyes. 

“Huh?” Iris folded her arms and returned his look. 

“If you couldn’t see me anymore, would you stick around? Would you still want to be friends with someone who…”

“Barry,” Iris started. She was almost mad at him for questioning their friendship. “You must know by now that I’d never abandon you, no matter what happens.” 

Obviously, Barry had known this. He hadn’t given his words a second thought before speaking them into the world, and was now regretting them. He peeled his eyes from hers and looked down at the floor. “I do know. I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay.” She took a few steps forward and put her thumb on his chin, her index finger propping it up. His eyes went back to meet hers, and tears were brimming in them. She moved in one more step and gave him a deep hug. “I know things will be alright in the end. I know they will.”

She felt him nod into her shoulder. Soon enough, it felt like she was hugging air. Barry pulled away and said, “I should go. See you later?” 

Iris crossed her arms again and replied, “Yeah, I will.”

As he left the room and Iris heard the door open and close, a thought crossed her mind. _You like him,_ her inner voice told her. 

“Shut up,” she told it. 

\----------------------------  
After that particular encounter, Barry once again took to the confines of his apartment for a full week. He didn’t really want to see anyone, or in his case, watch anyone. He knew how stupid that was, but he couldn’t stop thinking of the what-ifs. The only time he got any relief was when he disappeared into his collection of comic books, reliving his favorite storylines and moments. It was easy to pretend like he was a superhero; it was much harder to face reality as he knew it. 

In those days where he couldn’t bear the thought of leaving his prison, Barry spent his hours on his balcony reading said comic books. Every so often he would glance down at the street four stories below and out at his city, so full of wonder and life. He would mindlessly watch as people came and went on their daily lives, not even thinking twice about the privileges they had to be running errands as simple as retrieving medication from the pharmacy or depositing a check at the ATM.

As he hung out on his balcony for hours at a time, Barry subconsciously started to notice similar patterns. Every day around three, Wally would be dropped off on the curb by the same silver sedan. At four each day, Cisco returned from what Barry assumed was a job or internship, based on his professional attire. At five, Joe too came back to the apartment complex, often times holding bags of what Barry assumed were groceries or dinner. 

Iris didn’t seem to have much of a schedule. Now that she had started working at Jitters, she started coming and going at erratic hours, always wearing something different, always carrying herself in a different way. Sometimes she exhaustedly slugged into their apartment complex holding two to-go cups of Jitters coffee, after which Barry would hear a soft knocking at his door. Other times she would dance down the sidewalk, always wearing the same pair of faded turquoise earphones. It was during these times Barry could hear her singing out in the hallway, even from his residence on the balcony. Slowly but surely, he found himself beginning to stand next to his door for a clearer listen. 

Despite her always changing schedule and demeanor, he started to notice one consistent detail about Iris. No matter how she carried herself, her every feature seemed to shine in the sunlight, while in the evening, they stood out beyond the reach of any one streetlamp’s glow. These were the moments Barry would hold onto. 

And yet, these feelings were unnatural to him, completely foreign. Nevertheless, most days they seemed to distract him more than any comic book could. 

It was through these sessions alone on his balcony where he really got the chance to reflect about his life and the people in it. Though he wasn’t sure he was okay with Iris potentially losing her ability to see him, he thought that it wasn’t worth worrying himself about it. After all, what she said was true. What’s important is that they’ll be here for each other, no matter what might happen. 

\----------------------------  
Her first week at Jitters was a bit bumpy, but after a few spilled mugs of java and a toasted bagel which fell in a garbage can full of used cocoa beans, Iris was starting to get the hang of her new job. Her hours weren’t that strenuous, though they changed from week to week. She was imagining what she would do with her first paycheck when a customer coughed loudly. Iris didn’t know how long she’d been waiting for, but when she checked the line about five impatient looking people were standing behind the woman. 

“I’m sorry, ma’am. What can I get for you today?” Iris asked with a wide, apologetic smile. 

The woman, brown-haired and strict-looking, surveyed Iris with judgmental eyes and replied, “Just a black coffee to go. Plain.” 

“What size?” 

Giving Iris a look that read something like _shouldn’t you already know?,_ the woman responded, “Medium.”

Slightly terrified of the woman’s next reaction, Iris asked, “Name?” 

“Caitlin. Now could you hurry this up, I don’t have time to wait around.” 

_I know it’s only eight in the morning, but damn,_ Iris thought. Her father had warned her about the sorts of customers to expect while working at a coffee shop in a big ciry, so she wasn’t as fazed as she might have been a week ago. 

Plastering a fake smile on her face, Iris wrote ‘Caitlin’ on a medium sized cup, handed it to a coworker, and said, “That’ll be one dollar and fifty-one cents, please.”

The woman dug into her purse and tossed a five at Iris, who handed her back her change without losing her grin. “Have a nice day, miss.” 

Grumbling something like “you too”, the woman dumped her change into her purse and stormed over to the waiting area. Iris could swear she was mumbling under her breath about minimum wage employees, but she moved onto the next customer without breaking face. 

After the fifth customer in line had gone through, Iris was putting coins back into the register when she heard a friendly voice.

“I’ll take a nonfat mocha frap with no frap and light on the mocha and can you add skim milk but heat it to 157 degrees exactly and before it reaches that temperature add three dashes of cinnamon and a pinch of nutmeg.” 

With a smile that was indeed not fake, Iris looked up and saw Barry, perched on the counter like an excited puppy. Pretending to be counting out coins, she looked back down at the register and queried, “What are you doing here?”

“Couldn’t sleep last night. Thought I’d run in for a cup to get me through the day.” He took a look around to make sure no one was within hearing distance.

Iris tilted her eyes up just slightly and chuckled. “How do you expect to get it home without someone being curious about the floating paper cup?” 

“You’re right,” Barry agreed. “Maybe I just came here to visit you.” 

“Oh really?”

“Perhaps. Or maybe you came here to see me,” he teased. 

“That literally makes –”

“What’d you say, Iris?” questioned Tracy, the coworker she’d handed Caitlin’s cup to a few minutes prior. 

Alarmed, Iris replied, “Just talking to myself, going over the errands I have to do when I get out of here today.” 

“I hear ya. In fact I was wondering –”

Iris tuned her out, staring at Barry as he performed acts no sober person would ever dream of doing in public. He jumped into people’s photographs of their drinks, blew on people’s newspapers, and slightly inched people’s drinks one way or another. It was all quite amusing to watch, and when Iris started to laugh she heard Tracy ask, “What’s funny?” 

“Nothing.” 

“Allllright,” Tracy dragged out. “Fine, I’m going on my break.” 

Before Iris could respond yet another familiar voice broke the silence. “Oh hi, I didn’t know you were working here! Iris, right?” 

It was Linda, the editorial intern from CCPN. 

“Yeah, hi again,” Iris replied, her attention now fully snapping back to planet earth. Linda was in a similar outfit as she had been the first time they’d met. “You on your way to work?” 

“I am, actually. How’ve you been?” Linda checked to make sure no one was waiting behind her before setting her purse on the counter. 

Iris picked up a wet rag and wiped down the counter. Her eyes slid up to meet Barry’s, who was leaning down and blocking a fair amount of the empty counter space with his lanky arms with a sly grin. “I’ve been fine,” she answered, the sides of her lips curling up. “Haven’t spilled anything yet today, so that’s something.” 

“That’s good!” Linda applauded a bit sarcastically. “Hey, I actually wanted to give you something last week.” 

“Oh?” Iris queried. 

After ruffling through her purse for a few seconds, Linda pulled out a journalist’s portable notepad and a miniature pen. While she scribbled something on it, Barry peeked over Linda’s shoulder and flashed a thumbs-up to Iris, nodding his head enthusiastically. _What could this possibly be,_ Iris wondered to herself. 

“Here,” Linda said as she handed the paper over. On it was a CCPN email account and a phone number. “In case you ever want to hang out or something.” 

Iris was taken aback. She repeated, “Oh?” 

“Or…I mean, also if you wanted to ask me any questions about the internship, or about college. Whatever you need.” 

Iris looked down at the paper. “Thanks, Linda. That’s really sweet.” 

“You’re welcome. And I’d actually like to order some stuff, too,” Linda said with a small laugh. 

“Of course, what can I get for you?” Iris asked. 

After Linda ordered her drinks, the two said a mutual friendly goodbye. There still wasn’t anyone in line behind her, so Barry stepped back into his prior place. 

“So who was that? She seemed nice,” Barry said. 

In a hushed voice, Iris replied, “We can’t talk right now.” 

“We were talking just a few minutes ago,” Barry objected, standing up straight and shoving his hands in his pockets. 

“And Tracy thought I was talking to myself. I don’t – Hi, what can I get for you today?” 

It was then a man stepped in front of her register, dropping his suitcase on Barry’s feet. His eyes grew wide with pain and Iris tried her best to stifle a laugh as the man ordered his drink. Barry shook his head and pointed up at the ceiling before walking out the door. At first Iris was a bit confused, but after making change for the man something clicked in her head. When Tracy returned from her break twenty minutes later, Iris ripped off her apron and threw it at her. 

“Going on my break,” she declared, rushing towards the stairs. 

\----------------------------

Iris opened the door when she got to the top of the stairs, and there was Barry, who was looking out at the city, his back to her. “How’d you get up here? The roof is employee access only.” 

“Fire escape.” He answered simply, as if that was a normal answer. 

“Fire escape,” Iris repeated, muttering. She made her way over to him and lo and behold, when she looked down she saw stairs that crawled along the brick wall all the way up to the roof. “Oh.” 

“So…who was that?” Barry inquired. “It seemed like you guys knew each other.” 

“We met once. She’s an intern at CCPN,” Iris answered. “She might help me get an internship there in a few months.” 

“Ah. Sounds cool,” Barry replied, sounding a little downtrodden. He leaned on the parapet, Iris mimicking him absentmindedly. 

“It doesn’t sound like you think it’s very cool,” she noted. 

“No really, it is. Sometimes it’s hard, you know, hearing about your jobs, Wally and Cisco’s college classes…ugh.” Barry shook his head. “I feel like a broken record sometimes. Sorry” 

“Aren’t we all? It’s okay,” Iris said with slight giggle, nudging Barry in his arm to try to ebb his sudden glum mood. “Everything will be fine.” 

_For you, maybe,_ Barry thought, his attitude once again getting the better of him just then. It seemed to happen more and more frequently lately. “Yeah. Hey, I’m gonna go.” 

Iris pushed herself away from the parapet and hugged her arms to her chest realizing that might not have been the most comforting thing to say in that moment. “Okay, see you later.” 

And in a whoosh, Barry leaped over the short wall and bolted down the fire escape, each step resounding in a loud _clang_. 

\----------------------------

Barry was both sure and unsure of where that mood had arisen from. Of course he was happy for Iris. She was making connections in a field she was hoping to go into one day, something he’d observed learned while watching her update her LinkedIn page one day. On the other hand, what he said had been true. He felt like a twisted jerk, being jealous of other people’s successes, but it was how he felt, deep down. 

He contemplated this as he walked home and walked through the front door, not really bothering to see if anyone was in the lobby first. He pushed the “up” button on the elevator and tapped his foot anxiously. All he really wanted right now was to go to his apartment and collapse on the couch for several hours. 

When the elevator let him out on the third floor, Barry slumped to his room and pulled out his key from the depths of his raincoat jacket. After he wedged it out, he lost concentration and the key fell straight through his hands on the ground. 

_I’m a piece of shit,_ Barry thought, not necessarily thinking about how he dropped his keys. He picked up the key and stuck it in the lock, before feeling a current of electricity pulse through him, stronger than any electric shock he had felt before, but not nearly powerful enough to knock him unconscious. 

“What the fu-” he started to ask as he opened the door, only stopping when he saw a disappointed Cisco and Wally standing a few feet back from the door. “What are you guys doing in my apartment?” 

“Aw damn, it didn’t work,” Cisco sighed. “Back to square one.” 

“What didn’t work? How’d you guys even get in here?” Barry asked, incredulous. 

“We read something about certain types of electric currents stimulating a part of the brain not accessible the rest of the time…we thought we’d give it a try,” answered Wally. 

“It didn’t work, though,” Cisco repeated. 

“What though? What are you guys trying to do?” Barry looked back and forth his two friends standing before him, while them two looked at each other and the big black remote in Cisco’s hands, which was connected to a red wire wrapped around the doorknob. 

“We’re trying to access a part of your brain that might…” Wally fumbled, trying to find the words. 

“We want to help you become visible again,” Cisco said. 

Barry scoffed. “It’s not gonna work. Guys…just leave. I need some space.” 

“You’ve had space for quite a few days, now. We’re just trying to help,” Wally grumbled, crossing his arms the way his sister often did. 

“I understand, just go, please.” 

The two of them, muttering under their breath, reluctantly walked through the open front door. 

Before the door closed all the way, though, Wally’s eyes caught sight of something interesting. In the cloak of the dark foyer Wally couldn’t make out facial features, but he could distinctly see a dark shape take a deep breath and shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not promising when the next chapter will be up. I bet it will be quite a few weeks, maybe even after season 4 premieres, but in the meanwhile your kind comments keep me going. follow me on tumblr if you want to see what i'm up to: http://singularsensatiion.tumblr.com/
> 
> usual reminder not to be a jerk - keep mean comments to yourself, tell me your constructive criticisms. i'll take them to heart for the following chapters.
> 
> edit 9/5/17: chapter 11 coming along swimmingly. shouldn't be more than a week or two, for sure.
> 
> edit 9/11/17: for some reason chapter 11 got a lot longer than the others, so i'm still working on it. hopefully it will be published sometime this week. stay tuned.


	11. Experiment Success

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry finds a friend in the mirror for the first time, and someone from his past comes to visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I say this like every time, but this is the longest chapter I've ever written. Hope you enjoy.
> 
> Sorry for the slow burn, for the record. (If you've read the og book, one of its main flaws is its instalove. I wanted to avoid that.) 
> 
> Also - there's some callbacks to earlier chapters here, fyi.

On his way to the bathroom Barry shrugged off his jacket and threw it on the couch. Normally he would have watched how it became visible the moment he got the remaining sleeve off his arm, but it was pretty dark in his apartment. The curtains were shut from the night before, and none of the lights were on. 

He made his way through the familiar halls to the bathroom. There, without turning the light on, he turned on the sink and splashed his face with the cool water, the way he usually did when he was feeling at odds with the world. Much like standing in the rain, the bitterness of freezing water helped him realize that, yes, he was real. He existed, despite what the world told him.

After a few moments, Barry turned the sink off and held a washcloth to his face. Out of habit, he looked into the mirror. Despite the darkness of his main room, there was a bit of natural light coming through the window in his bedroom. This light illuminated something alarming in the mirror. It was a dark shape, the shape of a person. His heart started thumping; instinctively, he flipped on the light switch and immediately jumped back. 

There was a stranger reflected in the mirror. The stranger had tousled brown hair and was rather pale, some freckles dotted across his face illuminated by the soft pink glow of his cheeks. The stranger’s eyebrows were thick and raised up, shocked by the sight in the mirror. 

When Barry lifted his arm, the stranger lifted his arm. When Barry moved closer to the mirror, the stranger moved closer to the mirror. When Barry opened his eyes wide, the stranger’s eyes too opened wide. They were a robin’s eggs blue, just as Iris had described not very long ago. He could even see the small specks of green she’d told him about, too. 

It was one thing to hear what he looked like from Iris, but it was another thing to see it for himself. The longer Barry looked in the mirror, the more tears started to brim in his eyes. 

_This has to be a dream,_ Barry thought. He pinched the strangers arm and when he felt a twinge of pain, he looked down at where his arm was. A spot of pink was slowly fading on his forearm just as the pain subsided. 

“Holy fucking shit,” he exclaimed. 

After glancing back in the mirror for a few seconds, Barry immediately ran over to where he had left his computer this morning on the kitchen table. Opening it excitedly, he clicked on the photo-taking app that had been pre-installed. He had always wanted to remove it, but could never figure out how. At this moment, he was particularly thankful for that ignorance. 

When the app opened, Barry saw the stranger once again looking back at him. He pressed the camera button down, and as the app counted down to three he wore a facial expression that looked somewhere between a painful grimace and a exuberant smile. The shutter went off, and the app showed the final photograph. It was the stranger alright. 

“That’s me,” Barry whispered shakily, not sure that he could believe it. 

He shut his laptop and slid it across the table, euphoric. He’d never imagined that he would ever get a glimpse of himself, and now he even had a photograph to prove he’d actually seen what he saw. He decided he wouldn’t tell Iris, Wally or Cisco about what he had seen – he didn’t want to get any of their hopes up. It didn’t seem like what he’d managed to do was permanent by any means. He could almost feel himself starting to disappear again; his body felt fragile as ancient china. 

He stood up and opened his fridge. Snagging an apple, Barry walked over to his balcony and pulled aside the curtain. It was a gray day, the sun struggling to reach out from behind the clouds. His favorite kind of day. Smiling peacefully, Barry opened up the sliding door and tucked himself into his lawn chair. 

As he ate his apple Barry flipped through a water-stained magazine he’d never bothered to bring inside. He watched his hands flip the pages, hold the apple. It was an indescribable feeling. 

Before long, Barry felt the previous night’s lack of sleep catch up with him. The apple core fell out of his hands as he fell deeper and deeper into unconsciousness. 

\----------------------------

Barry awoke what he assumed was several hours later to the noise of a solid and steady knocking at his door. It was evening now, and at one point the clouds must have dissipated. The moon was becoming clearer and brighter in the dark azure sky. 

Not even stopping to consider that it might be anyone else but Iris, Cisco, or Wally, Barry groggily slumped over to the door, snatching a bright orange fleece blanket on the way. He wrapped himself in the blanket and opened the door, squinting at the light in the hallway. 

“Wh-”

“Hey there, we’ve yet to meet. I’m Joe, live down the hallway.” Iris’ dad pointed towards his apartment with his thumb, and then stuck his hand out politely to Barry. Through squinted eyes, he looked at it like the hand like it was some kind of alien spaceship. He peered down at his own hand, which he could still see, and held it out to Joe. 

“Hi,” he mumbled. Not thinking twice before saying it, he said his name. “Barry.” 

“Oh, you must be the Barry my Iris talks about.” Joe took Barry’s hand and grasped it so tight he was scared that it might start disappearing out of sheer force. 

“I must be,” Barry said as he shrugged deeper into his blanket. “Can I help you with anything, sir?” 

Joe shook his head and replied, “No need to call me ‘sir’. We’re neighbors, and you’re my baby girl’s friend.” 

“Alright, si-J-Joe.” Barry awkwardly looked around. “So, can I…?” 

“Ah, yes. It’s my day off, and I was trying to make dinner for my kids…would you happen to have a tomato to spare?” Joe asked, tapping his fingers together. 

Though Barry ate relatively healthily, he didn’t have much in terms of fruits and vegetables. Apples, bananas, and cucumbers were about as much nature as he consumed. “Sorry, I don’t think so.” Noting Joe’s face fall and remembering the fruit incident from a few weeks ago, Barry continued, “But you can ask Mr. Quincy in 4E. I always see him pick up a lot of vegetables at the farmer’s market.” 

Joe smiled politely. “Thanks, thanks a lot. Nice to meet you, Barry.” 

Barry began saying “Nice to meet you too,” but by the time his mouth formed the quiet words Joe was already halfway down the hallway, brushing by a man in a heavy black coat and an oddly memorable mud-brown ascot cap. Barry closed his door and began heading back towards his bedroom when he heard another knock at the door, this one impatient and heavy. Barry sighed and shuffled back to the front door, where he looked in the peephole. The figure was keeping its head bowed, so Barry couldn’t see who it was. 

Disguising his voice with a deep tone, Barry rumbled, “Who is it?” 

“Open up the door, Barry.” 

Barry knew at once who it was. He opened the door, and the man looked up. Seeing Barry, the man took off his cap and confused, he noted, “Oh, my apologies. I must have the wrong apartment…” 

Throwing the blanket off his shoulders, Barry wrapped his arms around his dad’s waist. He choked out, “It’s me, dad. It’s Barry.” 

 

“I am exhausted, oh man,” Iris exclaimed as she crashed into in her usual spot at the table. She’d gotten back from work a few hours prior, and had been staring blankly at her manuscripts in bed ever since she had arrived home. 

“Welcome to the workforce,” her father said. He was setting the spaghetti out on the table, along with a fresh salad. “Now that you’ve had the chance to sit for a few hours, would you care to tell me how work was today?” 

Iris ducked her head as he set out the silverware and plates. “Fine, I guess. Had a few bitchy custo-”

“Language,” her father warned. He had mentioned to her about a week ago that you had to be polite when talking about your customers, lest your superiors somehow catch wind of your words. 

“Sorry, _difficult_ customers,” Iris corrected as she rolled her eyes. Her father kissed her on the head, and she playfully pushed him away. 

“Wal, dinner! Not gonna call you twice,” Joe yelled down the hall. As he sat down, he asked Iris, “Anything interesting happen?”

Just then, Wally and Cisco came bolting down the hallway, the latter carrying a black box with dangling wires. They were both headed for the door when Joe queried, “Where do you think you’re going?” 

With Cisco’s hand on the doorknob, Wally turned around and tried out cautiously, “We’re doing an experiment?” 

Joe shook his head and pointed at one of the two empty chairs. “It can wait. Sit down.”

Wally tossed his head back and groaned. There was no arguing with their father when he made them dinner; he was too proud of himself. Wally gave Cisco the box and sat down in his chair impatiently. 

“Me too?” Cisco asked Joe, hopeful.

Joe looked back at his food, sizing it up before responding. “Fine.” 

“Awesome,” Cisco said excitedly. He put the black box on the counter, snatched a plate and a fork from the dishrack, and sat down next to Wally and across from Joe at the table. 

As Iris reached for the salad, her father took the massive bowl of spaghetti and asked again, “So, did anything interesting happen at work?” 

Iris looked down at the bowl of lettuce and tomatoes and replied, “The girl from CCPN showed up for a bit and gave me her number.” 

“The intern?” 

“Yeah,” Iris answered. She handed the salad to Cisco, who passed it on to Wally without taking any. 

“That was nice of her. Are you gonna call her?” Joe passed Iris the bowl of noodles.

“We’ll see, I don’t know.” She helped herself to a normal-sized serving, assuming Cisco and Wally were going to take enough for three people each. 

“You should, that was really nice of her to do.” 

In his annoying way, Wally teased, “Yeah, Iris, call her.” 

She glared at him from behind the pasta bowl. 

“Anything else?” Her father prodded. Obviously he was aware that Wally and Cisco had done nothing significant all day.

“Barry visited for a bit, too.” 

Joe picked up his fork and noted, “Oh, I finally met this Barry. The recluse one down the hall.” 

About to hand the bowl to Wally, Iris nearly dropped the bowl, as did Wally with the salad. Cisco, who’d been eyeing the pasta with his fork in hand, dropped it on his plate with a _clink_. 

Too startled to talk, Iris watched Wally ask, “You sure it was the right one?” 

Their father picked up his fork and began twirling the noodles as he said, “Lanky, white, awkward, wrapped himself in a blanket like some kinda lunatic.” 

The three of them simultaneously sat back in their seats and nodded. That sounded like Barry, alright. Wally and Cisco looked eagerly into each other’s eyes, while Iris sat there completely puzzled. She wanted to ask, _How, how in any universe could you have possibly seen him?_

Instead, she just acknowledged her father with a “Huh.” She glared at her brother and Cisco, who seemed to harbor some kind of secret. 

“Seemed like a nice kid. Weird as hell, but nice enough. I can see why you two are friends.” He took a bite of his spaghetti and took out his phone. At his last remark Wally laughed, while Iris shook her head in mock anger. 

For the next twenty minutes, they sat there in relative silence, Wally and Cisco breaking it every so often to ask for the noodles. Iris slowly ate what was on her plate and didn’t take seconds as usual – it was hard enough forcing the first serving down. When they were all done and the dishes were put in the dishwasher, Iris pulled Wally by his sweatshirt’s hood into her bedroom. Cisco happily followed, thanking Joe for the dinner on the way out of the kitchen. 

When they were all piled into her room Iris shut the door behind them and asked, “Did you know about this?” 

Again, Wally and Cisco looked silently at each other. Cisco answered, “Well, we suspected…” 

“What did you do?” 

Cisco explained what they had done as part of their experiment, and then said, “As we walked away Wally mentioned that he might have seen a figure behind the door, but he figured it was a trick of the light…I can’t believe it actually worked.” 

He laughed triumphantly and held out his hand, which Wally high-fived, sporting a wide grin. 

“Wow,” Iris said subconsciously. Her mind was moving a million miles a minute. She couldn’t really believe what she was hearing. “Is it permanent? 

The two boys’ smiles faded. Cisco surmised, “We have no way of knowing, unless you wanna go visit right now.” 

“Let’s,” Iris agreed. She opened her bedroom door and the they walked in a straight line out the door, Wally stopping to grab the black box from where it still sat on the kitchen counter. “We’ll be back,” she called out to her father, who was reading that day’s newspaper on the balcony. 

“Be safe,” he called back to a closed door. 

\----------------------------

“But…how?” Henry pushed his son back and, holding onto his shoulders, looked him up and down. Unfortunately, Barry was slowly disappearing – Henry was just able to catch a glimpse of half of Barry’s face before it vanished completely. “This isn’t possible.” 

“I don’t know, I don’t,” Barry answered, half-lying. He suspected it might have had something to do with Wally and Cisco, but he wasn’t positive. He figured it would be easier right now not to say anything at all. “Why are you here?” 

Suddenly turning cold, Henry took his hands off of Barry’s shoulders and pushed himself through the doorway. Barry leapt out of the way to avoid his father’s apprehensive stride. 

“You never called me,” was Henry’s succinct response. He shrugged out of his jacket and threw it atop Barry’s on the couch. 

“What? I wasn’t supposed to ca-” And just then, Barry recalled the last letter from his father which arrived three weeks prior, which read “call me” and nothing else. He had shoved the letter underneath his cutlery with no intention of calling his father. “Oh shit. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I’m here now, aren’t I?” Henry sighed loudly and collapsed next to their jackets on the couch. 

Barry, rooted to his spot near the front door, replied, “You didn’t have to come. You could’ve just called.” 

“Would you have answered?” 

Regretting his hug just a few moments before, Barry chose not to respond. “Look, is there something you actually want?” 

Henry glared in Barry’s general direction. “I wanted to visit one last time, before…” He hesitated. 

“Before what?” Barry ducked his head and folded his arms across his chest. 

“I’m moving to Australia with Tina. I suppose you’ll want to know why.” 

Tina was Henry’s longtime fiancé. They had met just before Barry moved back to Central City, and when she started spending more and more time at their house. When Henry had proposed still without telling her that he had a son, Barry had had enough. Enough of living on a farm in the middle of nowhere, enough of being ignored by his only family. His father let him go without much of an argument. This news, though, took Barry by surprise. 

“I suppose I do wanna know why,” Barry said, the blood leaving his head. Getting lightheaded, he propped himself up against the wall. Though his father had never really acted like a father besides paying for food and rent, especially in the last several years, Barry had always found comfort knowing that he was just a plane ride away. 

“Well,” Henry began. “Tina got an incredible job opportunity at a famous laboratory in downtown Sydney. All her family is there…she couldn’t pass this opportunity up.” 

“ _She_ couldn’t pass it up. But why couldn’t _you_? Why are you leaving m-” Barry paused. He hadn’t meant to say “me”; once again, he spoke without thinking about the implications behind his words. 

“I’m tired. I’m tired of being paranoid about someone finding out my past, finding out about you…” He took off his glasses and rubbed at the tip of his eyes. “I’m tired, son.” 

He didn’t want anyone to know that Barry existed, and this was painful to hear, though it was perfectly reasonable. Tears started to pierce Barry’s eyes, though he tried his hardest to be just as stone-cold as his father. “But you’re the only family I have left…You can’t leave.” 

As he was talking, Henry had stood up and was attempting to follow his son’s voice. He stood right across from him, looked where he figured Barry’s eyes might be, and said, “This isn’t the end. We can talk on the phone.” 

_Yeah, whatever,_ thought Barry. “Will I be staying here?” 

Henry too leaned against the wall and said, “Yes. From now on, I will be depositing money into your checking account, rather than sending a check each month. Here.” He rummaged through his pant pocket and pulled out a thin blue book - a checkbook. “They’re pre-signed.”

Barry took the checkbook with one hand and wiped at this tears with the other hand. “Thanks, I guess.” 

“Would you care to elaborate on why I could see you earlier, now?” 

Slapping the checkbook on his other hand, Barry walked into the kitchen and put it right next to where he had shoved the “Call me” letter. “I’m telling you, I don’t know,” he replied. 

Again, Henry sighed impatiently. “You know, you look just like my father. Besides your eyes. Those are-”

“My mother’s,” Barry finished. He had seen many a picture of his mother throughout his childhood; they were all scattered throughout his father’s Idaho cabin. 

“Have you eaten dinner yet?” Henry took out his phone and started tapping. “I’ll get take-out.” 

“Fine,” Barry said. The last thing he wanted right now was to eat dinner with his father, but he was in no mood to have a fight about it. “When are you leaving?” 

“Central City or America?” 

“Both, I guess.” Barry held onto the counter, watching his father awkwardly as he kept his eyes focused on his phone. 

“I’ll be leaving here tomorrow,” Henry said. 

_Thank hell for that,_ Barry said. “And the second?” 

“The new owners move onto the farm next Wednesday, so we’ll be gone by Thursday or Friday.” He then pressed the phone to his ear and began ordering dinner just a few seconds later. 

_Great,_ Barry thought sarcastically.

\----------------------------

Two hours later found Henry sleeping in Barry’s bedroom and two small empty pizza boxes on the kitchen table. Barry sat at the table, thinking, unmoved since they finished dinner nearly an hour before. 

When he heard Iris’s knock at the door, he fell out of his trance and went to answer the door. 

“Ayyyy…awwww,” Wally and Cisco shouted in unison. They had been expecting to see Barry, and when they couldn’t, they had become disappointed immediately. 

“Shh, my dad’s sleeping.” Barry slid through the doorway and closed the door quietly. 

Iris squinted at him and exclaimed, “Your dad?” 

“What?” added Wally. “What’s he doing here?” 

“Long story,” Barry answered, too tired to explain. “Why are you guys here?” 

Iris looked at her brother and Cisco and said, “We were coming by to see if their experiment had worked.” 

“And I guess it didn’t,” added Cisco. 

Abandoning his plan to keep them in the dark, Barry said, “It did work.” 

“But if it worked, why-” inquired Wally. 

“It came and went.” Barry shook his head. Iris could tell something drastic had happened with his father. “Look, can we do this another time?” 

When Wally and Cisco protested, Iris said, “Hey guys, we’ll come back tomorrow.” 

Remaining unmoved by her suggestion, Iris grabbed Wally’s sweater again and dragged him down the hallway to feeble pleas of “But…science!” 

Cisco gave Barry a sympathetic look. “I know how you feel. My parents aren’t the greatest, either.” 

Remembering Cisco’s story about how his parents had forgotten completely about Cisco’s birthday and taken Dante to the symphony instead of spend time with him, Barry nodded. “If you ever need to talk –” 

“We should,” Cisco said. He held his fist out and Barry met it with his own. “See you tomorrow.” 

By that time, Iris was strutting back down the hallway. When she reached them, she said, “Hey, if you want to work on that box with Wally, I left the door open.” 

“Thanks, but I’m gonna head home. Not about to give my parents an excuse to miss my next birthday too,” he said with a smirk, which Iris noticed Barry mimic. “Bye guys.” He headed down the hallway and opened up his door, upon which Barry and Iris heard angry Spanish come from the other side. 

“Wanna talk?” Iris asked, looking up at Barry compassionately, bouncing on her toes. 

Barry shrugged and backed up against the wall. “I don’t know.” 

Iris moved to stand right next to him, also against the wall. She said, “Now, if I know you at all, saying ‘I don’t know’ is code for ‘Iris, please help me’.” She spoke those words in a broody, low voice, urging a laugh from Barry. 

“You’re probably right,” he agreed with a hint of a smile. Iris slid down the wall and tapped the space behind Barry’s legs expectantly. He followed her and bent his knees towards his chest. 

“So, what happened?” Iris prodded. _Damn, I feel like my dad,_ she thought upon saying those words. 

“Like I said, it’s a bit of a long story…” 

“Well…why don’t you start with why he’s even here?” She offered. 

He let out a sigh and stretched his legs out. “Remember the letter? The one you stole?” 

Iris laughed. “Hey, I did not steal –”

He couldn’t help but return the laugh with a shy grin. “Irrelevant. Anyways, he had written on that letter to call him.” 

Iris conjectured, “And you didn’t, and that’s why he’s here.”

“Precisely.” Barry held up his index finger as if to reinsure her answer. His hands fell upon his thighs, which he stared at blankly. 

“What did he want to tell you?” Iris queried. 

And so Barry told her about how his father was moving and why, and Iris could now clearly see the exhaustion and frustration pouring out of him with every last word.

“I’m sorry, Bear.” She interlaced her fingers with his left hand, which still laid motionlessly upon his thigh. “We’ll be here, no matter what.” 

Barry wanted to say so many things in that moment, but was overwhelmed by the emotions that had just spewed from his mind. He slouched down the wall so he could lean his head on Iris’s shoulder, and they seemed to fit perfectly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) as usual - keep mean comments to yourself, no one wants to read them. constructive criticism accepted. 
> 
> 2) once again I have noooooooo idea when the next chapter will be up. I got really inspired after chapter 10 and that's why this one didn't take me very long. 
> 
> 3) For the next chapter I'd like to focus on Iris and Cisco's stories a little, so if that sounds like something you'd be interested in that's what the comment section is for.
> 
> 4) edit 9/19: made a Twitter! Follow me at https://twitter.com/bcwestallen
> 
> 5) edit 10/21: i've started chapter 12 - it's about halfway done. I'm not sure when to tell you to expect it, because I don't wanna disappoint - but it's a good one. I think you guys will really like it. Sorry sorry sorry for the long wait.
> 
> 6) edit 10/28: I'm so close to being done; I've got about 3-400 words left of a Barry/Iris conversation and then I gotta edit the chapter. Expect it soon but idk when. Thanks!


	12. Bam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Henry has an ulterior motive, Cisco comes across a new opportunity, and Barry and Iris fall into new territory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I'm so sorry this took centuries to finish. School has been tough, and I was ignoring my responsibilities even by working on this today, but I really wanted you guys to have this chapter finally. I don't know when the next one will be up.
> 
> Enjoy the cheese x_x

There they stayed for several minutes, which actually felt like several hours. 

“You know,” Barry began, still nuzzled up against Iris’s shoulder. “We’ve been so busy with my problems I barely even know what’s going on in your life.” 

“It’s okay, Bear,” Iris reassured. “I don’t mind talking about your problems.” 

Barry shook his head ever so slightly. “You don’t have to say that. Your feelings are important too.” 

Feeling her cheeks burn, Iris didn’t know how to respond to this. She’d never really had anyone tell her that her feelings were important – not a friend, not her father, and certainly not her brother. She nodded her head, failing to suppress an involuntary sob that came upon realizing that she’d never really had anyone to confide in. 

“So tell me,” Barry requested. “How have you really been feeling lately?” 

Blinking the tears away, Iris said, “I’m just a little worried about stuff, I guess.”

Barry picked his head up and looked at his friend. She was peering down at her lap, where she was knotting her fingers together as she tended to do when she was stressed. “Worried about what kind of stuff?” He asked. 

“You know, I was a good student in high school. Yes, I skipped every so often, but my GPA was decent. And people generally seemed to like me. I had a few friends, but no one very close, no one like-” 

And just then, she hesitated, realizing how she was going to finish that sentence. _No one like you._

“But no one who was ever that close to me. No one I could really share my feelings with, I guess,” Iris finished instead. Barry pursed his lips and bobbed his head. “I think what’s worrying me right now is how I’m going to fare in college, and whatever comes after. It’s scary, Bear. I’m scared.” 

“What do you think you’re most scared about?” 

Iris shook her head. “I think, maybe…” She paused, those tears wanting nothing more than to escape that prison of her eyes. “That I’m just going to end up being overwhelmed, that it will be too much for me. I’m scared that all of the scholarship apps and Dad’s extra hours at the precinct will have been for nothing, that my summer at Jitters will be for nothing, that I’m just going to screw it all up.” 

Barry wasn’t sure how to respond at first. He hadn’t had too much experience counseling others through the same anxiety that’d plagued him nearly every minute of his life. Finally, he replied, “You know, I’ve only really known you for six weeks. But in my world, that’s a lifetime.” She kept looking down at her lap, holding onto his every word. “And in those six weeks, you’ve shown yourself to be capable, strong, and just the right amount of stubborn.” She chuckled and lightly hit his left arm. “I think you’re going to be okay, and you’ve got three people who love you in case you ever feel like you’re drowning.” 

Stunned by the words he’d been able to string together, Barry hadn’t even stopped to consider the possible implications of the words “three people who love you.” 

“That means so much to me, it really does.” Iris wrapped her arms as best as she could around Barry. Her left arm was just barely long enough to stretch across his chest and reach his other arm. She swiveled onto her knees to hold him more easily, and he reciprocated the hug. 

“I should give you advice more often,” he laughed. She could feel him smiling into her shoulder. 

“Maybe you should,” she said, burying her face into the crease of his neck. His teal, cotton shirt smelled like warm vanilla, like home. Losing herself in the moment, she lost her balance. With a shriek, she pushed him backward, toppling him to the floor. She pushed up onto her hands and, noticing Barry was still laughing, started giggling herself. “Oh my god, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” Barry answered, his laughter fading. From his place on the floor, he got lost looking at her. In that moment, pinned underneath her smaller frame, he realized how the fluorescent lighting somehow never washed out her flawless medium complexion; he realized how her eyebrows scrunched together when she laughed; he realized how her strength reflected on how she carried herself every day. 

As he came out of his daydream, he noticed Iris had begun running her hands along the carpet frantically. 

“What are y-” He began to ask. 

“Just trying to find my earring, _Dad_ ,” she called out, putting an emphasis on the final word. Giving Barry a look that read _Don’t you dare make a sound_ , she continued brushing her hands around Barry’s head. 

“I could get used to this,” he mumbled. 

“Shut up,” she teased. “I’ll be inside in a few minutes, Dad. I know it’s here somewhere.” 

“Want me to help you look?” Joe asked from down the hall. 

“No, no, it’s okay. Just go back inside. I’ll be right there.”

Barry heard Joe sigh loudly and a door close. “Nice improvising,” he complimented. “Do you often tackle defenseless boys in apartment hallways?” 

She rolled her eyes. “I should probably get off of you now, should I?”

 _Well you don’t have to_ , Barry wanted to say. He also knew what he wanted to do, what he would never have the courage to do. He stammered, “I-I mean…” 

To his slight dismay, she sat back on her legs and let Barry sit up. 

“So I guess you-”

After a moment’s reflection, Iris didn’t let him finish his sentence. Instead, she tackled him again, this time falling atop his chest, purposely connecting her lips to his own. 

\----------------------------

Cisco took the stairs down to the third floor, and when he got to apartment 3A he tried the doorknob. It was locked, and he clumsily searched his pockets for his key. When he found it at last, the electric box had fallen to the floor. 

“Of course,” he mumbled. He unlocked the door, opened it, and picked up the box as he started to walk through the entryway. 

“Where have you been all day?” His mother, who was absentmindedly flipping through a magazine at the kitchen table while his father did the dishes, screamed in Spanish. “Your grandmother came for dinner, and you said you were going to be here to teach her how to use her email.” 

Cisco kicked off his shoes and shrugged. “I was with friends,” he replied. Hopefully she would just let it go. 

“You had no right to be out all day, young man.” She slammed the magazine shut and leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms and legs. 

“But I’m nineteen, I’m in college, I can do what I want.” Cisco protested.

“Not as long as you live with us, you can’t.” 

“Well I have no choice, I _have_ to live with you. Neither of you would let me live in the dorms, and these are the first real friends I think I’ve made all year.” 

“You know how expensive college dorms are, son,” his father responded, loading the silverware into the dishwasher. “Even with my raise and your mother’s business we don’t have the money to spare.” 

“You have the money to spare on Dante’s piano lessons,” Cisco muttered, immediately praying that neither of his parents heard what he had just said. They paid thousands of dollars a year for a professional piano player to teach Dante piano, and their excuses didn’t sit right with Cisco. 

Thankfully, neither of them heard his remark. They didn’t need to get into this fight right now and then. His father closed up the dishwasher and left the room, giving Cisco a sympathetic pat on the back on his way out. His mother, on the other hand, kept glaring at him. She ordered him to call his grandmother and apologize for missing dinner.

He rolled his eyes as he grabbed a cookie from the cupboard. “Fine.” 

As he left the room he swore he heard his mother grumble something about ungrateful children. 

Walking past Dante’s room, Cisco heard him practicing on his keyboard. Perfectly, of course. 

The last room on the right, Cisco opened his door and put the cookie on his desk. He collapsed face down on his bed, which was littered with engineering magazines and comic books, and idly tinkered with the box, lost. 

“Why didn’t it work?” he wondered aloud to no one in particular.  
Frustrated, he set aside the box and grabbed the nearest engineering magazine. It was from a few years ago, and S.T.A.R. Labs’ Harrison Wells was plastered on the cover, looking smug and proud in front of his building. 

A thought occurred to Cisco. He flipped to the cover story and skimmed through the article. At the end, it said: “For job opportunities, upcoming events, and further information pertaining to Dr. Harrison Wells and S.T.A.R. Laboratories, proceed to starlabs.com or email inquiries@starlabs.com.”

“Job opportunities…” Cisco muttered. He pushed off some of the magazines to clear a space for his laptop, which he pulled out of his backpack on the floor. After opening it Twitter’s familiar timeline popped up. Since meeting Barry he still visited the website, though he wasn’t as active as he once was. Cisco sighed and typed “star labs” into the browser’s search bar. 

While the website loaded, Cisco impatiently drummed his fingers on the space bar. To his dismay, his mother hadn’t wanted to spring for the more expensive yet more efficient Internet, so it took about two minutes for the page to fully load. When it did, photographs of the building and its interior took turns being showcased in a montage on the home page. 

Having interned at Mercury Labs as an intern for the past year, Cisco rolled his eyes. These photographs were propaganda, a mere attempt to intrigue potential donors. He scrolled all the way down to the bottom of the page and found what he was looking for – a link labeled “Internships”. He clicked it and waited the usual two minutes while the page loaded. 

With a link to add attachments, the page read, “We are currently accepting summer interns. Submit your resume, a cover letter, and your availability.” 

Cisco thought for a few minutes. S.T.A.R. Labs was the reason for the particle accelerator explosion. S.T.A.R. Labs was the reason for the metahumans around the city. If he got an internship there, maybe he could figure out a way to get rid of Barry’s invisibility. 

After frantically attaching the documents they requested, Cisco clicked submit. A circle started spinning on the page and a few seconds later confirmation message popped up. It read, “Thank you for your application. We will call you to set up an interview if we’re interested in bringing you aboard.” 

“What am I doing?” Cisco whispered to himself. 

\----------------------------

“Barry? Hello?” They had just parted, and Barry was laying on the floor in a daze. Leaning over him, Iris was waving her hands around trying to get his attention. He was now staring giddily at the ceiling. She knocked playfully on the top of his head. “Anyone in there?” 

He snapped out of it and looked into her eyes. “Did we just…in our apartment’s hallway?” 

Iris stood up and brushed carpet residue off of her pants. She stuck her hand out and answered, “I think we did.”

Barry focused his energy into his making his hand fully solid and grabbed onto hers. He too pulled himself up to a standing position and asked, “Should we talk about that?” 

All Iris wanted to do was talk, and maybe do some other things besides talk, but if she didn’t go back to her apartment her dad would come running out again. “I think we should, but not now. I’ve gotta get home like I told Dad,” she said. Though she tried to stop, she couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot. 

It was infectious. Barry was smiling too, just as much. “See you later?”

“Of course,” Iris responded. She perched on her tiptoes to kiss Barry’s cheek, and headed off in the other direction towards her apartment. He watched as she entered, giving him a shy wave before closing the door. 

_Wow_ , he thought, shaking his head. Just as he’d never dreamed he would have real friends, he would have never thought that someone who see him in that kind of way. Before two minutes ago, it had almost seemed like he was destined to be alone forever. 

He opened the door and his father was up and about, snatching his stuff from all over the apartment and stuffing it in a suitcase. 

“Dad, what’re you doing?” Barry questioned, puzzled. “I thought you were leaving tomorrow.” 

His father grabbed a raincoat and squashed it in between two sets of jeans. He replied, “I thought so too. Emergency at home. Tina needs me to be there. I’m leaving tonight.” 

“Tonight? But what about your flight tomorrow?” Barry sat down on the couch next to the suitcase. He tucked his knees into his chest and hugged them. 

“Cancelled it. There’s a train tonight from St. Louis to Boise, 11 p.m.” Henry was shaking as he zipped up his suitcase. He seemed oddly nervous. 

“Oh, okay,” Barry said glumly as he slumped back into the couch. He’d been hoping to have one last quality conversation with his father the following morning before he left. 

“I want you to come with me,” Henry said. He set his suitcase down next to the ottoman, and sat down in front of the spot where the couch was sunk in. “To the train station,” he added before Barry got any ideas. “I want to say a proper goodbye there.” 

Something was definitely off. His father had never been one to care for proper goodbyes. “Why?” 

“Look, Barry,” Henry held his hand out. He was waiting for Barry to take it, which he finally did, reluctantly. Looking down at the invisible hand in his own, he continued. “I’m moving far away for a very long time, and I don’t know when I’m going to see you –” He coughed awkwardly, and Barry took his hand back. “I don’t know when the next time will be when we’ll be able to meet in person again. I want you to come with me.” 

“Fine,” Barry agreed. “When are we leaving?” 

“Now.” 

\----------------------------

When Iris got back to her bedroom, she perched herself on the thin windowsill and stared out her window, thinking. Though she had so much to worry about, the only thing on her mind was Barry. After about ten minutes of staring out the window, her thoughts seemed to physically manifest. Four stories below, Barry was getting into a taxi with someone she could only assume was his dad. 

_Where are they going?_ She wondered. This was one of those times she wished Barry had a cell phone. The taxi drove off, its taillights disappearing into the city streets within seconds. 

\----------------------------

“So how do you expect me to get back?” Barry asked after Henry handed the driver a fifty and they got out of the car. “I can’t exactly take a taxi alone.”

The two of them stood in front of the train station. All of the lights were off inside, a closed sign was in the door, and no one seemed to be around for miles. 

“Dad? Why are we here? Why are you acting so strange?” 

“I’m sorry, son.” 

“Sorry for what? Dad?” Barry hugged himself, chilly. It had been an unusually chilly summer day, which continued into the dark night. “Why are we here?” 

Henry shook his head glumly. “I need you to get better.” 

“Get better? Wh-”

His father took a few steps back towards the vacated building and hid behind his suitcase. People in black uniforms appeared from around the corner, each of them holding tranquilizers. They all wore special glasses that had some kind of a weird film over the lenses. 

“Who are these people? What are you-” 

Barry tried to move closer to his father, but the man closest to him yelled, “Stand still!” 

His mind was racing a mile a second, Barry couldn’t understand anything that was happening; nothing made sense. Who were these people? What did his father mean by ‘get better’? Why was he being threatened with tranquilizers? 

“Dad, what is going on?” He asked again, pleading with the stranger he thought was family. 

Henry lifted his suitcase down and returned a look of utter guilt. “I can’t explain now.” 

“Can’t explain? But Dad-” Barry had taken another step forward, and immediately felt a sharp pain in his right shoulder. He felt his legs buckle, his face hit the concrete. The world went dark. 

\----------------------------

Barry had never experienced any sort of anesthesia before, let alone anything quite like a tranquilizer dart. When he woke up, his head felt like it was filled with bricks. His tongue felt like lead. His arms were heavy, and his right shoulder seemed to burn. 

When he opened his eyes, he was laying on a simple bed in some type of strange cell. The walls were padded and blue, except for one. That lone wall was the same weird film as the glasses those people had been wearing. On its other side, it was by something heavy-looking and silver. It almost looked like a door. 

_Where am I?_ Barry thought. Simply thinking the words seemed to provoke his headache even more. He closed his eyes again and hugged the thin blanket back over himself. Almost falling asleep again, his eyes suddenly snapped open and his mind rendered awake at the sound of heavy machinery. The heavy, silvery door was opening. Behind it stood someone who looked familiar, a few people in white robes, and his father. 

“Where am I?” Barry asked, sitting up in his spot on the rough bed. When his head spun, he held it stable with his left arm. It felt significantly steadier than if he had used his right arm. “What happened?” 

The familiar man took a few steps forward and smiled. It wasn’t an Iris smile, though. This one wasn’t reassuring, wasn’t caring. This one was sly, even a little terrifying. “I’m Dr. Harrison Wells. You’re in S.T.A.R. Labs.” 

“That dump?” Barry asked, mostly for his own benefit. He was almost hoping Wells hadn’t heard him, but he had. 

“Some people hold strong opinions of our institution, yes,” Dr. Wells said. He folded his arms across his black shirt. “But the work we’re doing here is unparalleled to any other modern scientific institution around the country.” 

“I’m aware,” Barry replied. With a devious smirk, he added, “Your work killed my mom.” 

“Son, be polite,” Henry spoke up. Barry looked at him, and for the first time in Barry’s life, his father was looking right at him. It made Barry uncomfortable, the same sort of uncomfortable that Henry looked like his as feeling. “You know Dr. Wells didn’t kill your mother-”

“No, Dad, only the particle accelerator, engineered and approved by Wells, killed her. Why am I here? Why did you bring me here?” He wished someone would answer his questions already. 

“Barry, you’re here because your father was concerned about you. You’ve been suffering under the effects from my particle accelerator for more than sixteen years. It’s about time that I remedy this wrong and get you your life back.” Dr. Wells suddenly looked sincere, like he really wanted to help Barry. Nevertheless, Barry didn’t trust this doctor in the slightest. “We’ll need your permission to take a blood sample, so we can start engineering an antidote to your invisibility.” 

Barry considered it for a few moments. “So you’re saying you won’t take my blood until I give you permission to?” Barry leaned forward and perched his elbows on his knees. 

“Yes, that’s what we’re saying.”

“Okay, then.” Barry made a decision, one caused by years of mourning his mother’s loss and years of mourning the life he should have had. Though he wanted nothing to do with S.T.A.R. Labs, nothing do to with Harrison Wells, he also wanted a normal life more than anything in the world. He didn’t know what he would give to go to dinner with Iris, attend a college lecture, pick up cereal at a real grocery store. He wanted this more than anything. 

“You can help me.” 

\----------------------------

Three weeks later, Iris was at her morning Jitters shift. She had just finished cleaning up a coffee spill, one that had been all the customer’s fault but also one she had had to take blame for. The man had begun yelling at her to apologize, and continued making a scene until she finally apologized. Tears were streaming in her eyes, and though her shift wasn’t done for another few hours she had elected to clock out for the day, just tell her boss that she was feeling sick, which she was. 

Aside from rude customers and the stress of college, Iris had been paranoid about Barry for the past several weeks. She hadn’t heard from him since that day where she had kissed him, and she was worried that she had screwed everything up. Almost every day since then she knocked on his door, sometimes more than once a day, but he never answered. All she wanted to do right then was crawl into bed and wallow, and that had been her plan right up until she opened the door to Jitters to leave and she saw Cisco. He was out of breath, as if he had just ran all the way here from somewhere far, far away. 

“Cisco, what’s going on?” She folded her arms and looked away from him, suddenly insecure about the redness that she was sure was staining her eyes. 

“Remember I told you a week ago I got the internship at S.T.A.R. Labs?” He asked, excited. 

Iris really didn’t care about his internship right then. Too many stressful things were happening for her to care. “Look, Cisco…” 

“I was there this morning. One of the doctors wanted me to bring a wrench down to a maintenance worker in the basement. On the way there, one of the cell doors was open.” 

“And?” Iris questioned impatiently. 

Cisco put his hand on Iris’s shoulder. “There was a thermal film covering the cell, and someone was definitely in there. I think it was Barry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> reminder to be kind and that if you want to be mean, keep it to yourself.
> 
> Also - I made a Flash/fandom twitter account. If you wanna follow me there, I'm @bcwestallen. 
> 
> thanks for being great.


	13. Plotting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Barry has a few unusual encounters while in S.T.A.R. Labs. Iris and Cisco talk it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking centuries to get this to you. After the abomination that was 4x13 and the slightly less awful 4x11-12, I finally felt up to putting up this next chapter for you guys.
> 
> Needless to say, I got a lil inspired by 4x10-4x12 for this chapter. Also the doctor in this chapter...I think you'll be able to guess who that is. I'm portraying her th is way for a reason - I don't plan on making her anything more than an evil doctor. 
> 
> With the way things are going in my semester and with the pacing of these current episodes, I hope to publish a chapter every few weeks or so. I have a real plan for where I want this story to go, so I think it won't be as hard for me going forward. 
> 
> Enjoy x_x

_A HALF HOUR AGO_  
Barry had no idea how long he’d been in S.T.A.R. Labs. He’d stopped keeping track after the eighth night, after the eighth blood draw, after his newest doctor said they were still working on a cure, after the eighth time they told him that they no idea when it would be ready. 

He wished he could say he resented his father for putting him in this situation, but Barry knew his father cared deeply about the people close to him. Even if he showed it in an unusual way, Barry knew his father cared about him too. Despite the needles and despite the awful experiments he’d be subjected to already, he still held out hope that it would work. That he’d walk out of this cell, visible to everyone, and that he would lead a normal life. 

But that was several weeks ago. Though his father had been back many times in those stretches of days, Barry started to grow and more frustrated. He was told the same thing every day:

“Your condition isn’t actively improving, but we’re close to finding a cure.” 

“No, you can’t use your cell’s phone to dial an outside line.”

“Only family can visit.” 

“You can’t skip the blood draw today. Hold out your arm.” 

All Barry wanted to do was rip off the doctor’s glasses so she wouldn’t be able to tell where he was. He figured out that, somehow, a metallic-looking film covering the lens made him visible to the doctors. For one of the first times in his entire life, he wished he could be invisible to everyone again. Being trapped in a minute cell for weeks on end at the mercy of his doctors’ wills was a unique, horrific kind of torture. 

When he started to get anxious about his current situation, he would count to ten, attributing one thing to each number that he would do when he was visible permanently. 

Go to the grocery store, pay at the cashier’s station. 

Ride in an airplane. 

Take Iris to a nice dinner. 

Use his own money to pay for the meal. 

Get a real job so he can pay for stuff, like a nice dinner for Iris. 

See a midnight movie premiere in a packed movie theater with his new friends. 

Join in with one of those protests he’d heard so much about on the news but had never attended, in fear that he’d be trampled and no one would notice. 

Get his GED. 

Enroll in college. 

Visit a theme park, go on a roller coaster. 

All of these things, and more, were on his list. Every day, he came up with something new. On this particular day, he decided that he wanted to also try ice skating and bowling whenever he got out of here.

That day, thus far, had been more of the same. The doctor had come in at eight a.m. to take his blood, bring him breakfast and lunch, and tell him they were still working on the cure and to hang in there. 

At five o’clock, though, his usual doctor didn’t deliver his dinner as she typically did. Every day before this one, she would open up the large glass door and pass him the tray by hand. Today, though, she used the small pocket door off to the side, which he discovered when he heard a foreign sliding sound. To no surprise, Barry saw the tray sitting in the small doorway’s entrance. 

After Barry took the four steps across the cell to pick it up, he saw that everything looked the same as it normally did. On the tray sat a cup of pudding, a turkey sandwich with limp lettuce, and a small bottle of water. This time, though, he spotted a smudge on one of the napkins. Curious, he set the tray down on his bed and read the writing. 

_It’s Cisco. Look up._

Taken aback, Barry peeked his head up. Sure enough, a familiar silhouette stood outside of his door. He ran up to the glass door and pounded, screaming Cisco’s name, though he doubted Cisco could actually hear him. The soundproofing was on, and nothing was going to get through the several layers of glass that shielded him from the outside world.

“Cisco! Hey! I’m in here! It’s Barry, I’m in here!” 

He stopped yelling when he saw the silhouette move to the side. Barry heard the little door open and close again, and he practically leapt to see what Cisco had put through it this time. This time, there was a napkin with yet another prompt on it. Moving to sit on his bed so he could put the napkin down - he was shaking too much to read the near-illegible note – Barry read the napkin aloud. 

“If it’s really you, come to the door.”

Napkin in hand, Barry stood up and quietly walked over to the door. He leaned all the way down and looked through to the other side, which was further away than he had expected. Suddenly, Cisco’s face appeared in the small hole. He was wearing the doctors’ glasses, though the large pair was sliding off his head. He had to hold onto the glasses with one hand and onto the door with his other. 

“Hi, buddy,” Cisco said. “Don’t say anything, I don’t want to risk them overhearing you.” 

Barry hadn’t planned on saying anything to begin with. S.T.A.R. Labs had proven to be unbelievably untrustworthy up to this point, and he didn’t know if there were security cameras in his cell, and if there were, he didn’t know if those cameras picked up sound. Per Cisco’s instructions, he stayed silent. 

“If you’re really Barry, and you can hear me,” Cisco began, “Slide that napkin back over to me. If you’re not Barry, I just made a really big mistake and I need to leave immediately.” 

Barry chuckled quietly and slid the napkin as fair through the tunnel as his lengthy arm could reach. 

Though Barry couldn’t see his friend’s eyes, he could see a smile creep across Cisco’s face. Through the smile, Cisco said, “We’ve missed you so much, Bar. I think Iris is about to fall to pieces any minute, even though she’s been putting on a brave face. She’s been spending a lot of time with Linda, which is good, but there’s been something off about her, for sure.” 

In that moment, Barry felt awful, suddenly yearning to see Iris more than ever. He can’t believe he let himself get locked up in this place for weeks without telling her where he was going. He sent a silent thank you prayer to Linda, who was playing the best friend role when Barry couldn’t. 

“But that’s not what we need to discuss right now. I can’t stay for long, otherwise my boss will get angry and start wondering why I took so long to deliver dinner to her patient.” 

Barry was confused. _Boss?_

Cisco immediately clarified. “Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you, sorry. I got an internship here.” 

Barry made a mental note to congratulate him later, even though working at S.T.A.R. Labs seemed like the most miserable thing a person could do to themselves. 

“Anyways, the point of my whole visitation here is that I need to ask you something.” Cisco gave up on holding the glasses up and just let them fall over his nose. Nervously, he questioned, “Do you want us to break you out of here? Is it as terrible as everyone says? Take the napkin back if yes, leave it if no.” 

With naked eyes, Cisco watched as the napkin independently slid back through the tunnel, disappearing when it got to the other side. 

Smiling again, he declared, “We’re going to get you out. I don’t know how yet, but we will. Keep holding on.” Barry saw him glance behind him. “I hear footsteps. See you soon, pal.” 

The door shut, and Barry was alone again. He walked a few feet to the left and saw Cisco’s silhouette fade out and meet that of his usual doctor. They talked back and forth for a few moments, Cisco handed something off to her, and they headed off in opposite directions. 

When Barry opted to take the napkin back and admit he wanted to leave, suddenly he didn’t care so much about receiving any cure. He just wanted to get out of this cell and return to his life. Even though it wasn’t normal by any means, it was his normal.

\----------------------------

 _PRESENT_  
“What do you mean you think it was Barry? How do you know?” Iris felt her head start to ache again, and she propped it up with her right hand. Ever since she had discovered she had some kind of meta ability, her head began aching at the most random times. 

Noticing her pained facial expression, Cisco took hold of her left elbow and led her over to a bench not too far away from the coffee shop. They sat down. Iris took her sunglasses out from her jacket pocket and put them on as if to shield the pain from its forthcoming waves. 

Cisco took his keys out, fiddling anxiously with them. Looking down at his hands, he said, “The thermal film is something I’ve been wracking my mind about. Why would they need one?” Matter-of-factly, he posed, “Why would they need something that illuminates a heat source for any other metahuman besides one-”

“That they can’t see,” Iris finished his sentence, easily connecting the dots. “So that’s where he’s been all this time.” 

“That’s what I think, at least.” Cisco sat back and looked up at the sky. 

Something was off about the way Cisco was acting. His arms were folded across his stomach, and he looked like he was going to explode at any minute, as if he was covering something up. 

“What are you not telling me, Cisco?” Iris asked. She had an ability to tell when people weren’t telling her the whole truth, and it had come in handy many times before this specific instance. 

“I…I…” 

Balancing the sunglasses on top of her head, Iris scowled and threatened, “Cisco Ramon, if you do not tell me everything you know at this minute I swear I will walk off and I will singlehandedly break into S.T.A.R. Labs myself. Tell me what you know.” 

He swallowed hard and tucked his head into his knees, morphing more and more into a turtle-like shape by the second. He mumbled something to himself, but Iris couldn’t hear a thing he was saying. 

“Cisco I swear-”

Cisco broke out of his shell and shouted, “I talked to him, okay?! I talked to Barry.” 

Her heart sunk even further. She turned to face Cisco, who was all curled up into himself. Quietly, she inquired, “You talked to him…and pretended like you weren’t sure it was him? What’s going on? Why’d you lie to me?” 

When he didn’t respond, she pulled on the back of his shirt and balanced him against the back of the bench. “I asked, what’s going on, Cisco? Why are you acting weird?” 

Squirming like a weird sort of worm, Cisco admitted, “Your courage can be intimidating…I don’t know. I should’ve told you right away, sorry.” 

“Thanks,” Iris grumbled. Putting herself back in the right headspace, she asked, “So, what did he say?” 

“He didn’t really say anything,” Cisco divulged. “I told him not to.” 

“Security cameras?” 

He nodded. 

“You’re saying that you met up with him…and didn’t say anything?” Iris pondered, confused. 

Cisco, who’d been nodding his head for the past fifteen seconds or so absentmindedly, was now shaking his head side to side. “No, I asked him if he wanted out.” 

He went silent, and Iris’s eyes widened. Subconsciously, she whacked Cisco on his arm. This was going way too slowly for her patience level. “And?” 

Rubbing his arm, Cisco scooted a few inches to the right, as if to protect himself from further ambushes. He mumbled quietly, “He does.” 

Iris nodded thoughtfully. Her mind, which had always been logical and quick, was already concocting a plan. 

“What’s our next steps?” Cisco asked her, taking his keys out of his pocket so he could have something to fiddle with. “I know the kinds of stuff they do to metas in S.T.A.R. Labs. It’s not pretty.” 

Pulling herself out of her planning mode, Iris folded her arms across her chest and relaxed against the bench. “What do they do?” she asked, not really wanting to hear the answer, but also needing to know at the same time. 

Twisting sideways to face Iris, he answered, “I’ve heard stories from the other interns. I don’t know if they’re true.” 

“And?” 

Sighing, he divulged what he had heard. Excessive blood work, serum injections with six-inch needles, forcing down pills that would drive your powers out of control or paralyze you, and more. “But like I said,” Cisco warned, “I’m not sure how much of this is true.” 

“Why hasn’t anyone done anything? Surely this can’t be legal?” Iris asked, her eyes blurring with light tears. It sounded like an awful place. 

Cisco shrugged. 

Standing up abruptly, Iris stuffed her hands in her pockets and started marching in the opposite direction. “We have to talk to him.” 

Startled by her abrupt change in mood, Cisco also jumped up and followed Iris, struggling to keep up with her brisk pace. “How do you suppose we do that?” He looked at her. She was thinking hard, off in another world. “The basement is locked, only people with key card access can get down there, and only the top management has those key cards.” 

Iris questioned the obvious. “Well, how did you see the cells the first time around, then?” 

They reached a crosswalk that had just changed to the hand signal when they reached it. Iris leaned against the light fixture and peered at Cisco, puzzled but determined. She raised an eyebrow when he hesitated to answer. 

Mumbling his words, Cisco responded, “One of the doctors…she lent me her key card.” 

The sign across the street turned over to the walking man signal. Before crossing the street, Iris grinned widely at him. “Well she’ll just have to lend it to you again.” 

After they crossed the street, they continued on the pathway back to their apartment. “I don’t think it will be that easy, Iris,” Cisco mentioned. “She only gave it to me because someone ate all of her pudding, so she had to go chew that person out, and she threw the keys at me so I could feed her patients their dinners.” Iris laughed heartily. “I don’t think she’d be so willing to give them up to a low-level intern another time.” 

Just then, Iris’s phone buzzed. She pulled it out of her pocket as they walked down the sidewalk. It was a text from Linda that read: 

_Still on for tonight?_

In the weeks that Barry had been missing, Iris hadn’t had someone to really talk to as a close friend. Wally was her brother, and was about as helpful as a brother could be when it came to talking about feelings. Her dad wasn’t really an option. Cisco was nice, but Iris could tell he was a little intimidated by her. Either that, or he had a little crush on her that manifested in an awkward sort of way.

On the other hand, Linda had been a mentor the past several weeks, even giving her a tour around Picture News’ office, but she’d also been a good friend. They spent a lot of time together, talking about everything – from writing, to the Picture News’ internship, to college courses Linda recommended and ones she definitely didn’t, to their likes and dislikes, to their respective friends. Turns out, they had a lot in common, particularly in the “friends” department. Neither one really had very many close ones except for a handful. Linda shared stories of her and her two best friends from high school, both of whom went to international universities. Iris talked all about her and Barry, though she obviously had omitted the more delicate details of his story and the fact that she possessed metahuman powers of a sort. _She doesn’t need to know now,_ , she told herself every time she felt guilty for lying. 

They had made plans to go out to dinner tonight, but all Iris wanted to do was start scheming Barry’s rescue mission with Wally and Cisco. Concurrently, she also knew that she was really happy when she got to spend time with Linda. In fact, spending time with her made Iris the happiest she’d been since that night Barry had gone AWOL. She wrote back: 

_yeah, but let’s get takeout instead of going out. i’ll pick it up?_

“Who was that?” Cisco asked, shuffling his feet loudly against the pavement. 

“Just Linda,” Iris responded. Cisco had met Linda a few times, but they had never spent much time together. 

“Oh,” he replied. Not sure what else to talk about, he asked, “So, what do you want to do about Barry?” 

Her phone buzzed again. Linda’s next text read: 

_for sure, i’ll come by around 7._

Iris checked her phone’s clock, which read “6:27” in big white letters. 

“Iris?” He nudged her with his elbow. 

“Yeah…” she looked up from her phone at Cisco, who was looking at her with a raised eyebrow. “Um…why don’t you come by around 10 and we can start coming up with a plan?” 

He nodded. “Cool, okay.” When Iris said goodbye and turned right instead of going straight, the direction of their building, he yelled, “Not going back?” 

Iris turned around and walking backwards, called out, “Picking up dinner. See you later.” 

Iris turned around and didn’t hear what he said next. Her head was buzzing with activity – she thought of Barry, she thought of Linda, she thought of the jerk from work earlier in the day, she thought about the fact that it was already July and that she’d be starting her freshman year of college in less than two months – and her world seemed to turn upside down. 

The headache from just a few minutes prior was making its return. She balanced herself against a construction fence, taking some deep breaths while getting her bearings for a few moments. When her mind finally began to cool off and the buzzing relaxed, she pulled out her phone and dialed the number to her favorite Thai place. 

\----------------------------

Later that evening, Barry was sitting on his bed, his dinner beside him, untouched. He couldn’t believe that Cisco had really found him, and that there was a chance he’d get of there sooner rather than later. He was almost giddy, but he had to tell himself not to get his hopes up, that it would just destroy him if Cisco and Iris couldn’t end up doing anything to rescue him. 

At just the moment where Barry was considering taking a bite of his sandwich, the thermal film disappeared into the ceiling and the glass door opened. He hadn’t been expecting a visitor this late in the day. Normally, the last person to visit him before bed was the person to bring him dinner. 

When the door opened all the way, it was his normal doctor. For some reason, she never wore a nametag, but she always wore her hair in the same way. Ginger-colored, a few inches past her shoulders. She never failed to wear three-inch high heels every single day, as well as the notorious thermal goggles. 

 

“Hi doctor, I wasn’t expecting you,” Barry said. The doctor smiled and stepped over the threshold into his cell. “Is there a reason you’re here tonight?” 

“You know,” the doctor said as she moved Barry’s dinner tray aside and sat down next to him. “We’re really close to finding a cure, for the very first time since you’ve arrived here.” 

Barry’s heart seemed to sing. “Really? Wow, I can’t…” He paused, his mind drawing a blank as to what he was going to say next. 

His doctor laughed with a hint of malice in her voice, something Barry found rather frightening. He’d always had a weird vibe about her, but she’d never appeared _evil_ to him before. 

“I can imagine this is very overwhelming for you to hear.” She sighed and pulled something out of her lab coat pocket. Barry couldn’t see what it was, but she didn’t hesitate to explain. “This is a sample of the cure. It’s been tested, and if all goes right, it should be the first step to making you visible again.” 

“That would be amazing, Doctor,” Barry remarked. Just then, his doctor uncovered what was in her hand. It was a small white bottle, unmarked. It almost looked like the bottle eye drops came in. “Is there anything I have to do?” 

His doctor stood up and explained, “This cure attempt is administered in the form of eye drops. Tilt your head back and hold your eyelids open wide.”

Barry did as she said, his heart thumping nervously as she took the lid off of the small bottle. Though her laugh had concerned him for a second, her confidence in this cure put him at ease. 

“Alright, here we go.” She leaned over and put two drops somehow right in the middle of his right eye, and then she did the same to his left. “Now, to get this to work to the best of its ability, I need to put a drop on your tongue.” 

Barry blinked through his wet eyes and clarified, “My tongue?” 

Exasperated, his doctor latched onto Barry’s chin and yanked his mouth open. Before he could protest, the cure liquid was on his tongue and making its way down his throat. 

“I can’t have you talking,” his doctor said. She looked at the bottle and smiled, admiring her handiwork, and looked back at him. “Especially not to the interns. Have a good night’s rest, Mr. Allen.” The doctor walked right on out into the hall, making sure to close the glass door on her way. 

“What do you mean that you can’t have me talking? Doctor?” Barry moved to chase after her but the second he stood up, his vision went wonky. It felt like he imagined feeling drunk would feel like, though he’d never had the experience. 

He tried calling out for the doctor, even with the soundproofed door up, but he felt an unusual burning scratch in his throat that made it near impossible to speak. He whispered, “Doctwer…Doct…Deck…De…” By the time he got to his last attempt at saying the word, his voice was gone. Every attempt at saying a word was replaced by desperate rasping. 

Tears swarming with the eye drops making it impossible to see anything, somehow Barry was finally able to crawl back towards his bed. He leaned against it, his vision growing worse and worse by the moment. It was starting to tint a bright red, and everything looked scratched. It was as if an animal had clawed its way across his eyes, and it gave off the sensation of having scrapes on your sunglasses but not being able to do anything to fix them. He could see around the edges, but just barely. 

Though it didn’t physically hurt, the scratched red was so painful to look at that he stayed in his spot on the floor, eyes closed. He rocked back and forth, silently screaming, hoping that his friends would somehow hear him and come as soon as they possibly could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As usual, if you don't have anything nice/constructive to say, don't leave a mean comment. That said, I always like hearing what you guys have to say about my writing, even if I don't respond to the comments right away. 
> 
> follow me on Twitter for Flash-y/fandom-y stuff: @bcwestallen
> 
> hope you enjoyed this chapter, and thanks for your continued support.


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